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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇸🇮 has shared:

Sorry for the things I said when I thought you weren’t listening.

Someone from 🇨🇴 has viewed:

Don’t tell me about Stockholm Syndrome, I woke up at 6 AM on my first day of vacation wondering how things were going at work.

Someone from 🇯🇵 has bookmarked:

I tried to clean up my Chrome tabs but it turns out all 200 of them contain information that is vital for my survival.

Someone from 🇶🇦 has viewed:

Based on the amount of laundry I wash each week, I’m starting to think there are people who live here that I haven’t met yet.

Someone from 🇰🇪 has shared:

I just want what every middle-aged person wants: to remember what it was that I wanted.

Someone from 🇲🇬 has shared:

Absolutely no reason for a single guy to be in a sunflower field. Get out of there, pervert!

Someone from 🇮🇳 has downloaded:

If my trainee says “oh God” one more time, he’s going to meet him.

Someone from 🇵🇬 has downloaded:

Oh, sorry about bouncing my leg. I’m not allowed to slam my head into the walls anymore.

Someone from 🇰🇿 has shared:

Friends come and go, like the waves of the ocean, but the true ones stay like an octopus on your face.

Someone from 🇵🇼 has copied:

Hate when people ask “why is it called Silence of the Lambs?” Like, did you hear any lambs during the movie? Use your head!

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,288

Social Media Log 💫

Just shared via X:

The adult version of “head, shoulders, knees and toes” is “wallet, glasses, keys and phone.”

Making waves on Twitch:

“It can’t get any worse than this”, I lie to myself knowing it will absolutely get worse.

Seen just now on LinkedIn:

The problem with meal prep is you have to eat the meal that you prepped.

Spotted on Threads:

I like deadlines. They make me functional.

Shared recently on WhatsApp:

Interesting people are my favorite endangered species.

Freshly posted on Facebook:

I totally get why Leonardo DiCaprio is trying to save the environment for future generations. They could be his girlfriend.

Seen just now on LinkedIn:

I don’t want flying cars, I want the ability to start again from my last save point.

Seen just now on Threads:

One thing that sucks about being grown-up is not being able to say, “My mom said no,” when you don’t want someone to come over.

Just shared via Instagram:

I feel like we’re all just angry and horny.

Seen just now on Instagram:

I’m feeling very anxious. I think this 7th mug of coffee will take the edge off.

Funny earworm quotes

Funny earworm quotes are here to tickle your brain and bring a smile to your face! 🎶😄 These quotes capture the humorous side of those songs that just won’t leave your head. Get ready for a dose of laughter as you dive into the world of catchy tunes and their delightful, and sometimes irritating, persistence. 🕺🎵

New funny earworm quotes 👇

All funny earworm quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

Funny Quotes Collections
✨ New Funny Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

20 shares on TikTok this month:

I’m not lazy, I’m on power saving mode.

15 shares on X this month:

My theory is that women’s voices contain frequencies that men simply can’t hear.

92 shares on YouTube this month:

Imagine hating me and I’m just over here doing an epic air-drum solo to ‘In The Air Tonight’.

57 shares on Discord this month:

Did anyone ask the daylight if it wanted to be saved?

19 shares on Snapchat this month:

I wonder how much this “Never mind, it’s only 10 bucks” has already cost me?

86 shares on Pinterest this month:

I think it’s time we acknowledged how incredibly stupid most super wealthy people are.

93 shares on WhatsApp this month:

Sticking googly eyes on a potato and introducing him to everyone as my new boyfriend.

14 shares on Messenger this month:

I’m so bored, I’m gonna join a poly-relationship and stage a coup and kick the main one out.

88 shares on Telegram this month:

“Nah.” – everyone with an office job, from the Monday after Thanksgiving until January 2nd.

15 shares on Discord this month:

Rest here, weary doom-scroller, you’ve seen enough bullshit for one day.

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes 💥

23 folks are currently checking 👀

I have a very particular set of useless skills.

6 folks are currently checking 👀

Floppy disks are like Jesus. They died to become the icon of saving.

10 folks are currently checking 👀

Apparently, I’m not even going through a lot; I just need money.

17 folks are currently checking 👀

My first instinct when I see an animal is to say “hello.” My first instinct when I see a person is to avoid eye contact and hope it goes away.

25 folks are currently checking 👀

Thanks for your email! Unfortunately, I have filled my pockets with stones and am making my way to the sea.

13 folks are currently checking 👀

If snails are so slow, why don’t we ever see them coming? It’s just BAM, there’s a snail.

21 folks are currently checking 👀

Whenever Im in trouble, I think, what would Jesus do? Then I pretend to be dead and disappear for 3 days.

25 folks are currently checking 👀

We all have needs. I need my wife to go run errands so I can swipe the last donut.

12 folks are currently checking 👀

Don’t invite me places. I was cesarean. I didn’t want to come out then and I certainly don’t want to now.

7 folks are currently checking 👀

Sharing wired earphones is a forgotten form of intimacy.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,391

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇸🇪 has shared:

All these self-driving vehicles… It’s only a matter of time before we hear a country song about his truck leaving him.

Someone from 🇦🇺 has copied:

Sundays are no place for pants or responsibility.

Someone from 🇦🇺 has viewed:

Do you know how much trauma it took to be this funny?

Someone from 🇷🇸 has bookmarked:

The date abruptly ended over a disagreement on how to pronounce Gnocchi.

Someone from 🇪🇨 has bookmarked:

I’m nervous that my diet pill will stick in my throat, so I usually eat a few cookies after to help push it down.

Someone from 🇬🇹 has shared:

When I look at the world, I realize why Noah only took animals with him.

Someone from 🇺🇦 has downloaded:

I’m either freezing, peeing, or starving.

Someone from 🇪🇨 has viewed:

“Are we still going?” … An introvert’s attempt to cancel.

Someone from 🇲🇹 has viewed:

Remember you are dust and, after you send this email, to dust you shall return.

Someone from 🇻🇳 has downloaded:

The gossip in my town is faster than the Wi-Fi.

Social Media Log 💫

Going viral on WhatsApp:

I drive home so quick after work like I’m late for the house.

Going viral on Twitch:

I fear one day I’ll see one of my posts marked as an “Exhibit A”

Just shared via WhatsApp:

Life sucks a lot less when your feet are in a creek, and you forgot your phone in the truck.

Just shared via Messenger:

Just because it’s a bad idea doesn’t mean that it ain’t gonna be a hell of a lot of fun.

Freshly posted on WeChat:

I used to work at McDonald’s and we only told ugly people that the ice cream machine was broken. So I have bad news if you were ever denied ice cream.

Spotted on Facebook:

If you love someone, let them go. If they come back with snacks, it was always meant to be.

Making waves on Discord:

Self-awareness is such a two-edged sword. Like, yay, I know myself better, but at what cost?

Making waves on Facebook:

One day I’ll have a sassy, know-it-all daughter, and my husband will say, “She got that from you,” and I can’t wait.

Breaking via TikTok:

Apparently, stress balls are not supposed to be thrown at people who are stressing you out.

Going viral on Pinterest:

My therapist is so lucky. I’m like a Netflix Original that pays her to watch.

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