29 Funny Jesus quotes

• The year number is getting too big, let’s do another Jesus soon.

  ---

  0

  3 days ago

  another, big, calendar, getting, humor, Jesus, joke, number, religious, religious joke, soon, time, too, year

• Jesus invited prostitutes to dinner and was praised for compassion. I do it, and suddenly I ‘made Christmas awkward.’

  ---

  0

  5 days ago

  awkward, Christmas, compassion, dinner, humor, i, invitation, invited, Jesus, norms, prostitute, social, social norms

• Hiking in your 40s is a great way to meet new people. Today I met two paramedics, three nurses, a cardiologist, and nearly met Jesus.

  ---

  0

  3 weeks ago

  40s, accident, activity, cardiologist, great, health, hiking, humor, i, Jesus, medical, meet, met, new, nurse, outdoor, outdoor activity, paramedic, people, three, today

• Floppy disks are like Jesus. They died to become the icon of saving.

  ---

  0

  1 month ago

  death, died, disk, floppy, floppy disk, humor, icon, Jesus, metaphor, saving, technology

• “I asked ChatGPT.” Okay, well, I asked Jesus Christ of Nazareth.

  ---

  0

  2 months ago

  asked, ChatGPT, christ, conversation, humor, i, Jesus, Jesus Christ, joke, okay, religious, technology, well

• “You’re always drinking wine!” God forbid a girl enjoys the first miracle of Jesus.

  ---

  0

  2 months ago

  always, drinking, enjoyment, fun, girl, God, humor, Jesus, miracle, sarcasm, wine

• You want me to do Pilates? The thing that killed Jesus?

  ---

  0

  2 months ago

  exercise, fitness, humor, Jesus, killed, me, Pilates, reference, religious, religious reference, sarcasm, thing, want

• Jesus Christ. I haven’t seen a meltdown like that since Chernobyl.

  ---

  0

  2 months ago

  Chernobyl, comparison, disaster, exaggeration, humor, Jesus, meltdown

• Jesus spent his time among the mentally ill, the poor and unemployed, the prostitutes. So, in a way, by being on Twitter, we’re like Jesus.

  ---

  0

  2 months ago

  among, being, comparison, humor, i’ll, irony, Jesus, media, mentally, mentally ill, poor, prostitute, social, social media, spent, time, Twitter, unemployed

• Jesus, I need money to organize your birthday.

  ---

  0

  2 months ago

  birthday, celebration, fun, i, Jesus, money, need, organize

All funny Jesus quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌