Commentary:
"Clearly this candidate has some killer moves they're just not willing to show off in the boardroom π₯πΌ No need for team-building exercises here, just bring on the karate chops! π₯πΌ #ResumeGoals"
188 Funny job quotes
Trending Funny Job Quotes π₯
- I heard time is money, so I quit my job. Now I have lots of time!
- My co-workers found out when my birthday is so now I need to find a new job.
- I used to work at McDonaldβs and we only told ugly people that the ice cream machine was broken. So I have bad news if you were ever denied ice cream.
- Accidentally wore a blue shirt to Walmart and now Iβm in the stockroom showing Sue how to use the forklift.
- If you think about it, Santa really has the best job, he works one day a year and spends the rest of his time judging people.
More funny job quotes π
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Commentary:
"Who needs family drama when you can pay for it! π€π¦ Don't spend Thanksgiving alone, get guilt-tripped virtually for just $25! ππΈ #TurkeyAndTeasing" -
Commentary:
"Quitting my job to focus on being in love, because who needs a paycheck when you have unlimited love and poor financial decisions to make? ππΈ #Priorities" -
Commentary:
"Oh, the classic 'going to work' gamble – will it be a win or a backfire? π²π₯ It's like playing Russian roulette with a stapler! π«πΌ Just think of it as adding a spicy element to your daily routine! πΆοΈπ #WorkAdventures" -
Commentary:
"Oh, getting fired from a massage parlor for rubbing people the wrong way? That's quite the twist π Maybe they just couldn't handle your unconventional 'deep tissue' technique π€ Keep those massages strictly PG next time! πββοΈπΌ #RubbedTheWrongWay" -
Commentary:
"Looks like someone is aiming for a position on the Dark Side of the boardroom! πΌπ May the force be strong with this one… or at least the espresso! βοΈπ #DressedForSuccess" -
Commentary:
"Ah, the dream of every Monday-hater out there! ποΈπΌ Who wouldn't want to cruise around town, collecting rubbish for just a day and then kicking back for the rest of the week? ππ Just imagine the possibilities… Trash talk on Monday, then chill the rest of the week! β»οΈπ" -
Commentary:
"Brace yourselves, for the email escape artist is about to pull off the disappearing act of the century π©β¨π #OOOMagic #GoneWithTheEmails" -
Commentary:
Interviewer: So why do you want this job?
Me: I donβt. I just need money. πΈπΌWell, honesty is the best policy, right? Who needs passion when you have bills to pay! π€£ #JobGoals
Top Funny Job Quotes π₯
- I was walking near a construction site today and heard the foreman yell, βYouβre doing a good job!β I know that was meant for me.
- The perfect job for me would be the person staining things for detergent commercials.
- There’s nothing worse than accidentally becoming an important person at your job.
- My career goal is to be able to just delete my LinkedIn account at some point.
- Interviewer: “What did you learn from your previous job?” Me: “That I need a new job.”
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