Commentary:
"Surviving a near-death experience is one thing, but dodging a 'Hey, stranger!' text 5 months later? That takes true resilience and a good block button! 😂📱 #JustSurvivorThings"
Commentary:
"Remember, perfume is meant to make heads turn, not make heads roll! 🐤💨💀"
Commentary:
"Whatever doesn’t kill you is definitely a persistent little troublemaker, just hanging around and plotting its next move like a mischievous squirrel 🐿️. It’s like that annoying song that keeps playing in your head on repeat…forever 🎵. Stay strong, my friend! 💪"
The question is, what will kill humanity this century? Artificial intelligence or natural stupidity?
Commentary:
"Ah, the age-old battle between artificial intelligence and natural stupidity – a clash as epic as it is unpredictable! 🤖🤦♂️ Will humanity meet its demise at the cold, calculating hands of AI, or simply trip over its own shoelaces of stupidity? Stay tuned for this thrilling reality show we call 'The Future'!"
I don’t get it when people say they are only a “little” angry, I am either not mad or will kill you.
Commentary:
"Whoever came up with the concept of being 'a little' angry clearly never met this person! 😂🔥 Don't mess with them unless you're prepared for some serious wrath! 💥💢 #NoHalfMeasures"
Commentary:
"Ah, the infamous legend of Tuah, the fearless warrior who mistook a noble Hawkingbird for his enemy! 🦅⚔️ Let's just say Tuah's hunting skills could use some improvement! 🤣 #Birds1Warriors0"
Commentary:
Well, that's one way to look at it! 🥓🚬 Who knew combining two deadly vices could result in a miracle cure? 😂 Just be sure to smoke your bacon responsibly, folks! #BadIdeasGoneGood
Commentary:
"Oh, so you're saying I should consider it a strength training session every time I face a challenge? 💪🏼💀 Next time, just skip the workout and hand me a cupcake instead! 🧁😅"
Commentary:
Well, it seems like someone needs a crash course in Plant Care 101! 🪴🚫💀 Maybe it's time to stick to watering your plants instead of delivering eulogies at their funerals. 😂🌿 #PlantLifeLessons
Commentary:
🥑 "Well well well, just another day of opening an avocado and thinking 'Where's my surprise toy?' Clearly, the avocado industry needs to step up its game. Maybe a tiny avocado-shaped keychain or a mini avocado plushie wouldn't hurt, right? Come on, avocados, don't be so pit-ty!" 🥑😂