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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇲🇼 has viewed:

As an academic, I sometimes dream about writing fiction instead, and then I remember grant proposals.

Someone from 🇦🇴 has shared:

I wonder what the other me’s are up to in other dimensions.

Someone from 🇧🇼 has viewed:

Just give your kids the iPad. They’re the ones who’ll be fighting cyborgs in the future.

Someone from 🇺🇬 has copied:

Watching women’s tennis and getting angry at the net. We shouldn’t put needless obstacles in the way of women.

Someone from 🇲🇿 has shared:

I have this rare skin disease called perfect.

Someone from 🇧🇬 has bookmarked:

As I’m cleaning my room, this is a friendly reminder that you actually don’t need that free t-shirt or tote bag from that event.

Someone from 🇱🇨 has bookmarked:

Typos is the Greek god of spelling errors.

Someone from 🇧🇦 has viewed:

Awkwardly stares into the abyss in between meetings.

Someone from 🇷🇴 has bookmarked:

Not using emoji while texting is my way to show that I’m serious.

Someone from 🇸🇩 has viewed:

My grandmother is a shining example of how you can live until 90 years of age, sustained by nothing but spite and biscuits.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

2448 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

12,610

Funny Quotes Topics

15,283

Funny Quotes Images

12,610

Updated

55 minutes ago

Users Online

3,447

Social Media Log 💫

Breaking via WhatsApp:

Starting is the hardest part. Unless it’s eating chocolate. Then stopping is the hardest part.

Spotted on X:

Don’t forget to brush your teeth, comb your hair, cleanse your face, and share my posts.

Going viral on WeChat:

Shopping is the only exercise I need.

Spreading quickly via WeChat:

The older I get, the more I understand why people live in the woods and talk to squirrels.

Making waves on Slack:

They said don’t try this at home, so I’m coming over to your place.

Freshly posted on Snapchat:

I always like to remember the time before the internet. It was so good not to know how cruel and stupid humanity really is.

Spotted on Twitch:

Are you really a personal trainer or do you just want to wear shorts to work every day?

Just landed via WeChat:

I withdraw my argument. I didn’t realize you had a meme to back you up.

Breaking via Reddit:

My kids and I have this bit where I say something and they ignore me.

Seen just now on Slack:

I hope the world needs to be saved from the apocalypse with video game skills so my teen’s entire life won’t have been a complete waste.

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Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

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Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

2448 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

12,610

Funny Quotes Topics

15,283

Funny Quotes Images

12,610

Updated

55 minutes ago

Users Online

3,447

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇦🇿 has downloaded:

People always ask me why there’s a chair in my shower. Who the hell eats breakfast standing up?

Someone from 🇸🇱 has bookmarked:

Some things are better left alone, like me, for instance.

Someone from 🇰🇭 has downloaded:

I’m single because of everyone else’s shortcomings.

Someone from 🇱🇰 has downloaded:

No, you tell me what YOU were doing during that gap in my resume.

Someone from 🇸🇰 has downloaded:

Don’t be coming into my house and causing big spikes of cortisol.

Someone from 🇬🇭 has copied:

When I was growing up I always wanted to be someone. Now I realize I should have been more specific.

Someone from 🇲🇳 has viewed:

For years I thought an oncologist was just the doctor they kept on-call at all times.

Someone from 🇸🇷 has copied:

I don’t run from my problems. I sit on my couch, play on my phone, and ignore them like all other adults.

Someone from 🇸🇮 has downloaded:

It’s like 10,000 Tupperwares when all you need is a lid.

Someone from 🇰🇿 has downloaded:

I’m tired and drank a lot of coffee, so now I’m tired but faster.

Social Media Log 💫

Trending via Instagram:

It’s a beautiful day to ignore your existing problems and create new ones.

Spreading quickly via WeChat:

You ever meet an all-male friend group that is less a group of friends than it is “one guy and his henchmen”?

Freshly posted on Twitch:

Is Craigslist still around, or did everyone over there get murdered?

Just landed via TikTok:

Sure, money can’t buy happiness, but it can definitely buy a jet ski… and have you ever seen a sad person on a jet ski?

Freshly posted on Facebook:

Experience is what you get when you don’t get what you wanted.

Spotted on Telegram:

Just blocked all the normal people, so if you see this… sup, weirdo.

Just landed via TikTok:

“Your account balance is low!” Brother, wait until you see my will to live.

Broadcasted on Snapchat:

38% of being a dad is sitting in a car, looking at your watch, and waiting for everybody else to come out.

Trending via Pinterest:

Every squad has that person who has to go home early.

Just landed via Snapchat:

Just emerged from my Y2K bunker. Everybody okay?

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