21 Funny milk quotes

• Leaving out milk and cookies for Santa is literally making an offering to a deity.

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  1 week ago

  cookie, deity, holiday, humor, leaving, literally, making, milk, offering, Santa, tradition

• Accidentally said “normal” when they asked what milk I wanted at the leftist cafe.

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  3 weeks ago

  accident, accidentally, asked, cafe, humor, i, interaction, leftist, milk, normal, said, social, social interaction, speech, wanted

• Interviewer: Give an example of a difficult scenario and how you handled it. Me: I poured a bowl of cereal but had no milk, so I used ice cream.

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  3 weeks ago

  bowl, cereal, cream, difficult, difficult scenario, example, food, give, humor, i, ice, ice cream, improvisation, interview, interviewer, me, milk, problem, problem-solving, scenario, solving, used

• “We’re the only species that drinks milk after infancy, dairy is bad for you!” We’re also the only species that drinks peach mango pineapple spirulina kale smoothies, Karen. Let me eat my cheese in peace.

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  1 month ago

  after, bad, cheese, dairy, drinks, eat, health, humor, infancy, kale, Karen, let, mango, me, milk, only, peace, pineapple, smoothie, specy

• Mixing 1% milk and 2% milk to create the forbidden 1.72% milk.

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  1 month ago

  1, 2, beverage, create, dairy, forbidden, humor, joke, milk, mixing, playful, pun, quirky

• “Got milk?” Buddy, I don’t even have self-esteem.

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  1 month ago

  buddy, confidence, even, got, humor, i, irony, milk, sarcasm, self-deprecation, self-esteem

• That moment when you dip your cookie in milk for too long and it breaks off, then you wonder why bad things happen to good people.

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  1 month ago

  bad, bad things, break, cookie, frustration, good, good people, humor, lesson, life, life lesson, milk, moment, people, snack, things

• Santa punched a hole in my wall because I left him soy milk.

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  1 month ago

  hole, i, left, milk, Santa, wall

• Santa: “Don’t leave me milk. Leave me whiskey.”

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  1 month ago

  Christmas, drinks, holiday, humor, joke, leave, me, milk, Santa, whiskey

• Grocery shopping before Christmas is a nightmare. My milk expired while I was waiting in line.

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  2 months ago

  before, Christmas, expired, grocery, grocery shopping, i, line, milk, nightmare, shopping, waiting

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