311 Funny morning quotes

• I hate texting someone something freaky at night, and they reply in the morning like it’s still the vibe. Shut up. The sun’s out. I’m pure again.

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  6 days ago

  again, communication, freaky, hate, humor, i, mood, mood shift, morning, night, pure, purity, reply, shift, shut, someone, something, still, sun, texting, vibe

• What did people do before alarm clocks? Just go to bed like, “Hope I wake up in time for work tomorrow.”

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  7 days ago

  alarm, alarm clock, bed, bedtime, before, clock, clocks, hope, humor, i, just, morning, morning routine, people, routine, sleep, time, tomorrow, wake, waking, waking up, work

• They’re making me get out of bed.

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  3 weeks ago

  bed, getting, getting up, making, me, morning, reluctance, sleep, tiredness

• Sex is great, but have you ever had your alarm go off and then realize you don’t have to get up today?

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  3 weeks ago

  alarm, day, ever, freedom, great, humor, lazy, lazy day, morning, realize, relaxation, sex, sleep, today

• Every morning I wake up and make the worst possible time management decisions anyone has ever made.

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  4 weeks ago

  anyone, decision, decisions, ever, every, humor, i, management, morning, procrastination, self-deprecation, time, time management, wake, wake up, worst, worst decision

• I love how “sleeping in” used to mean noon, and now it means 8:30 a.m.

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  4 weeks ago

  am, change, humor, i, lifestyle, love, mean, means, morning, noon, routine, sleep, sleeping, sleeping in, time, used

• iPhone: I’m gonna update your software tonight while you sleep. Next morning, iPhone: I couldn’t do it, bro. Just didn’t feel right. Vibe was off.

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  1 month ago

  apology, bro, feel, humor, i, iPhone, just, morning, next, right, sleep, software, technology, tonight, update, vibe, while

• Beds are always the coziest when it’s time to get up and you don’t want to.

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  1 month ago

  always, bed, beds, comfort, cozy, morning, reluctance, sleep, time, wake, wake up, want

• Now I get why my grandma got up early to have a little coffee by herself.

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  1 month ago

  coffee, early, early riser, got, grandma, humor, i, little, morning, riser, solitude, why

• First date idea: you bring me coffee in bed, and we snuggle all morning.

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  1 month ago

  bed, bring, coffee, cozy, date, date idea, first date, idea, me, morning, romantic, snuggle

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