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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇱🇻 has bookmarked:

I have a lot in common with AI. We occasionally provide incorrect information with a confident tone.

Someone from 🇧🇪 has copied:

No camera can do justice to a landscape that melts your heart.

Someone from 🇦🇪 has copied:

In retrospect, I guess “one drunken night of stupidity” isn’t the best response when a child asks you where babies come from.

Someone from 🇲🇽 has bookmarked:

Summer is the best because there’s always a chance I’ll see someone trip on their own flip flop.

Someone from 🇨🇷 has bookmarked:

My fantasy is having two men at once. One cooking, one cleaning.

Someone from 🇹🇳 has copied:

Great minds think alike. Unfortunately, so do stupid ones.

Someone from 🇹🇷 has copied:

Sundries sounds like something grandma would call scandalous underwear.

Someone from 🇹🇷 has downloaded:

I always wonder who makes a more stupid face: women putting on make-up or men shaving?

Someone from 🇧🇴 has viewed:

There’s a reason we say cheese and not salad when we have to smile for a photo.

Someone from 🇸🇨 has bookmarked:

Overheard the most hilarious conversation on my morning commute, then realized it was just me talking to myself in my car.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,538

Social Media Log 💫

Going viral on Messenger:

If I’m ever found dead in the woods, it’s probably because I was trying to pet a bear.

Just shared via Reddit:

I’m at that point on a Monday where no.

Broadcasted on Facebook:

Mindfulness is out. We’re doing drugs again.

Shared recently on WhatsApp:

It’s difficult to play hard to get when I’m already hard to want.

Trending via Messenger:

It’s all fun and games until you send the clapping emoji instead of the prayer hands when commenting on the news of a death in the family.

Shared recently on LinkedIn:

I’m sick of waking up thinking about the government, and going to bed thinking about the government.

Seen just now on Instagram:

You ever see a woman so beautiful it makes you momentarily mentally ill?

Just shared via WhatsApp:

Unfortunately, I have the paper towel habit of a much wealthier woman.

Making waves on Threads:

Babe, are you OK? It’s already Q4, and you’ve barely touched your “2025 roadmap.”

Shared recently on Telegram:

I think the world is ready for a fat James Bond.

Funny Nike quotes

Funny Nike quotes bring the perfect blend of motivation and humor to your day 😄👟 Whether you’re hitting the gym or just need a laugh while rocking your favorite kicks, these clever sayings will keep you inspired and smiling 😂🔥 Get ready to sprint through life with wit and style—because why just run when you can run with a grin? 🏃‍♂️💨 #JustLaughIt

New funny Nike quotes 👇

All funny Nike quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

Funny Quotes Collections
✨ New Funny Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

66 shares on Slack this month:

You can’t ’48 Laws of Power’ me.

69 shares on LinkedIn this month:

I’m starting to think the voice in my head doesn’t like me very much.

40 shares on Facebook this month:

As a kid, I used to watch The Wizard of Oz and wonder how someone could talk if they didn’t have a brain. Then I got social media.

31 shares on Telegram this month:

The sheer audacity of life to ask anything of me today.

18 shares on Reddit this month:

You know those lines you see painted on parking lots? I know this will come as a shock to some of you, but you’re supposed to park between them.

43 shares on Snapchat this month:

Cinderella had one night out, and it changed her life. I had one night out, and it changed my credit score.

37 shares on Messenger this month:

I predict the next world war will be artificial intelligence versus genuine stupidity.

21 shares on WeChat this month:

Good things happen when you smile or when you’re naked.

92 shares on Snapchat this month:

If Stranger Things was British, it would be called ‘Bit odd, innit?’

84 shares on Slack this month:

I love the idea of a fruitarian, just morally affronted that anyone could eat a baby spinach.

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes 💥

21 folks are currently checking 👀

They should invent a rom-com where no one has to overhear anything that leads to a huge unnecessary misunderstanding.

5 folks are currently checking 👀

Sitting in a room with my husband and kids… Suddenly I realize everyone here has been in my vagina. Wow.

25 folks are currently checking 👀

Hate all political parties and you’ll never be disappointed.

25 folks are currently checking 👀

When is this robot army coming to take my job?

11 folks are currently checking 👀

Stretching isn’t enough. I need to be able to disassemble my body like Legos.

5 folks are currently checking 👀

I’m at the age where any time my mom asks if I remember so-and-so from high school, the news is never good.

10 folks are currently checking 👀

Welcome to your 40’s. You now have a favorite vegetable peeler.

6 folks are currently checking 👀

I’m eating for two; me and the person I strive to be.

19 folks are currently checking 👀

How much longer do we have to keep pretending that Pilates isn’t a sex thing?

10 folks are currently checking 👀

Cars should have two horns, one for “excuse me, kind friend,” and another for “curse you and your family for generations.”

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,317

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇬🇹 has downloaded:

If anyone wants to sponsor me, I’ll be running a 0.002K this weekend to raise awareness for laziness.

Someone from 🇹🇭 has viewed:

I don’t really do one-night stands, but I will do, like, 3-8 months of a semi-toxic, undefined relationship that wastes my time and ruins my life.

Someone from 🇦🇴 has bookmarked:

Not to brag, but my date returned after using the restroom.

Someone from 🇲🇬 has bookmarked:

I have now spread out a blue tarpaulin in the garden. I want it to look like I have a pool on Google Maps.

Someone from 🇹🇷 has bookmarked:

Adult friendships are difficult. The people I get on best with never want to leave the house either.

Someone from 🇦🇸 has downloaded:

Apparently the thirstiest creature in the whole world is always a kid who’s been told to go back to his bed like a hundred times.

Someone from 🇳🇵 has viewed:

Situationships are just you pretending you’re okay with getting used until they find someone they actually like.

Someone from 🇱🇺 has viewed:

This going into the office stuff blows. Like, I seriously have to wear clothes now.

Someone from 🇦🇱 has copied:

I hate when my kids ask me impossible questions like: What day is it?

Someone from 🇪🇨 has bookmarked:

Y’all ever skip a class and then have the post-skip class depression? Like, damn, I should’ve just gone.

Social Media Log 💫

Just shared via WhatsApp:

I have this ability where I can look at someone’s profile picture and determine whether they are evil or not.

Seen just now on Twitch:

A plus of getting older is not having to make as much small talk because half the conversation is spent asking the other person to repeat what they just said.

Trending via Slack:

Girls will be like “I have so much to do” then grab some snacks and start watching a 10 part docuseries on serial killers.

Spotted on Telegram:

If you can’t say anything nice, say something funny.

Freshly posted on Twitch:

The lion is actually pretty concerned right now.

Making waves on LinkedIn:

To be fair, a dumpster is like one of the safest places to have a fire.

Spotted on Threads:

Spice up your anxiety attack by playing the Jaws theme song.

Shared recently on WeChat:

How do they know an animal is extinct? Like, have you really looked everywhere?

Seen just now on Threads:

HR: “Please complete our anonymous survey.” My boss then later: “Don’t forget the survey, HR said you are the last one from our team.”

Live now on WhatsApp:

Going to bed early is easy, going to sleep early is a whole other set of problems.

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