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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇸🇹 has bookmarked:

That awkward moment, when all eyes are on the bride, but your son is the groom.

Someone from 🇬🇪 has bookmarked:

Stop expecting people to be as cool as you, it’s a recipe for disappointment.

Someone from 🇮🇩 has shared:

Daily reminder that you’re biologically programmed to get laid, eat good food, connect with other humans, and enjoy yourself. Everything else is literally made up.

Someone from 🇹🇱 has bookmarked:

Can you delete that photo of me? It looks exactly the way I look in real life.

Someone from 🇰🇬 has shared:

Can everyone please turn their A/C off during the day, we need that power to generate images of people with eight fingers.

Someone from 🇸🇮 has copied:

It’s lowkey nothing else to do except become a better version of yourself, lol.

Someone from 🇳🇪 has copied:

I hate when I turn my car on in the morning and the music starts blasting, and I am like, “Whoooah, big fella, I’m not the same person I was last night.”

Someone from 🇸🇿 has downloaded:

It’s a shame that the know-it-alls know everything better but don’t do anything better.

Someone from 🇭🇷 has shared:

Call me a glitch, cause I’m definitely messing with your system.

Someone from 🇹🇳 has downloaded:

You do not have to prove your own humanity to others. Unless it’s a captcha.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

0 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,269

Funny Quotes Topics

17,387

Funny Quotes Images

15,269

Dec 31, 2025

3,714

Social Media Log 💫

Live now on Telegram:

Don’t fall in love. It’s bad.

Freshly posted on Messenger:

If you watch Home Alone backwards it’s a loving story about a kid that heals two men that were savagely beaten.

Seen just now on Messenger:

If I’m too quiet you can rest assured I’m in the process of planning my sweet escape or your equally sweet demise.

Shared recently on Pinterest:

“We will go ahead and make these changes if we don’t hear from you before Friday” is such an elegant way to solve problems.

Making waves on LinkedIn:

Book reviews be like: “5 stars. I’m sobbing. I’m unwell. I haven’t eaten in 16 hours. Highly recommend.”

Shared recently on WhatsApp:

Elevator rides in real life: 30 seconds long. Elevator rides in movies: Two minutes long.

Breaking via Slack:

If I ever find out who stole my identity, I’ll pay all their debts and ruin their credit score just for fun.

Trending via YouTube:

Me (young, naive): “I hope something good happens.” Me (now): “I hope whatever bad happens is at least funny.”

Shared recently on Telegram:

You get to a certain age and realize stretching is non-negotiable.

Shared recently on Facebook:

I can’t believe that it’s our turn to give money to our nephews and nieces.

Funny Olympic quotes

Funny Olympic quotes bring the lighter side of the world’s biggest sporting event to life 🏅😂 From unexpected moments to witty athlete wisdom, these gems will have you laughing faster than a 100m sprint 🏃‍♂️💨 Whether you’re a sports fan or just here for the fun, get ready to smile, chuckle, and maybe even snort a little 🤪🔥 Let’s dive into the playful spirit of the Olympics like never before! 🎉🥇

New funny Olympic quotes 👇

Figure skating is so niche that sometimes I walk in the rink, and there’s an Olympic medalist there.

0

3 weeks ago

figure, figure skating, humor, i, ice, ice rink, joke, medalist, niche, niche sport, Olympic, Olympic medalist, rink, skating, sometimes, sport, sport joke, walk
Much like an Olympic sprinter, I also load up on carbs, exert myself for roughly two minutes, and then quit for the rest of the day.

0

2 months ago

activity, carbs, day, effort, exertion, fitness, humor, i, laziness, load, minutes, much, myself, Olympic, quit, rest, sprinter
The difference between the Olympic village and a normal village is that not everyone in the Olympic village is related to each other.

0

2 months ago

athletes, competition, difference, everyone, humor, normal, Olympic, related, sports, village
Olympic gymnast: does the most amazing thing I have ever seen in my entire life. Announcer: Oh dear, that will be a point deduction.

0

2 months ago

amazing, announcer, competition, deduction, ever, gymnast, humor, i, life, oh, Olympic, point, point deduction, seen, sports, thing
I love all the Winter Olympic events, sliding downhill on a piece of wood, sliding downhill on two pieces of wood, sliding downhill in a piece of wood. All amazing.

0

2 months ago

amazing, downhill, events, humor, i, love, Olympic, piece, pieces, sliding, sport, winter, Winter Olympic, winter sport, wood
If barking at nothing was an Olympic sport, my dog would win gold.

0

3 months ago

barking, behavior, dog, gold, gold medal, humor, medal, nothing, Olympic, Olympic sport, pet, pet behavior, sport, win
Maximizing rent value by turning ‘homebody’ into an Olympic sport!

0

5 months ago

homebody, maximizing, maximizing value, Olympic, Olympic sport, rent, sport, turning, value

All funny Olympic quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

🎉🥂 New Year Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

66 shares on X this month:

Money talks, and also waves goodbye.

79 shares on WhatsApp this month:

Every citizen over 18 should be eligible to be drafted into the Postal Service.

86 shares on Reddit this month:

Summer is the time when it’s too hot to do what it was too cold to do in winter.

48 shares on Threads this month:

I say “long story short,” and suddenly we’re in Act III with an intermission.

65 shares on Discord this month:

“I’ve tasted going back to an ex, and I’ve tasted trying to fix a relationship before it breaks. I highly recommend focusing on your career and going to sleep before 10 p.m.”

46 shares on Reddit this month:

You can tell a lot about someone by the stuff you make up in your head about them.

87 shares on TikTok this month:

A car window made specifically for a dog to stick its head out of is called a sunwoof.

46 shares on X this month:

When I’m president, everyone who listens to techno, house or rap will be allowed to drive a little faster than others.

71 shares on TikTok this month:

My husband sure has a lot of opinions on which movie he’s gonna sleep through.

27 shares on Discord this month:

Imagine hating me, and I’m just here unloading my dishwasher.

Trending Topics 📁

Hot Jokes 💥

6 folks are currently checking 👀

Super excited about a brand new week of questioning all my life choices.

15 folks are currently checking 👀

My apologies to the Goodreads reviewer who found my novel about vampires on a submarine, “unrealistic.”

21 folks are currently checking 👀

One does not simply become a master of karate. First, you must accidentally walk into a spider web.

12 folks are currently checking 👀

You miss 100% of the gossip from the phone calls you don’t answer.

12 folks are currently checking 👀

Every gift guide for men is like “A flannel flask to hold your knife flavored whiskey.”

24 folks are currently checking 👀

“You’re an adult, maybe it’s time to stop fighting with people on the internet.”

15 folks are currently checking 👀

I survived a Monday, and for what? Tuesday? Disgusting.

10 folks are currently checking 👀

Instagram should let you extend the run of one story for another 24 hours if the intended target didn’t see it.

7 folks are currently checking 👀

Sorry, I can’t come. I’m still recovering from the last time I went out.

22 folks are currently checking 👀

Short men store so much anger in their little body.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

0 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,269

Funny Quotes Topics

17,387

Funny Quotes Images

15,269

Updated

Dec 31, 2025

Users Online

3,337

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇲🇰 has downloaded:

Silk is a crazy material. “I like your shirt,” thanks. It came out of a bug.

Someone from 🇦🇩 has downloaded:

When a man is a good cook, that cancels out like three red flags.

Someone from 🇱🇧 has shared:

Keep moving, lady, I don’t have room for you in my delusions right now.

Someone from 🇳🇵 has bookmarked:

When someone loses something, I like to ask helpful questions like ‘Where did you last see it?’ and ‘Where did you put it?’ and ‘Where is it?’

Someone from 🇸🇱 has viewed:

If you get cremated after you die, you can be put into an hourglass and still participate in family game nights.

Someone from 🇲🇦 has shared:

According to a study, people believe anything that starts with ‘according to a study’.

Someone from 🇧🇾 has downloaded:

Girlfriend is temporary, ex-girlfriend is forever.

Someone from 🇧🇾 has viewed:

I’m a work in progress that hasn’t made much progress.

Someone from 🇰🇬 has bookmarked:

Nose so runny it just signed me up for a 10k.

Someone from 🇨🇴 has viewed:

The opposite of “taking candy from a baby” is “putting sunscreen on a toddler.”

Social Media Log 💫

Going viral on YouTube:

Anytime someone throws a Great Gatsby themed party, I have to assume they never finished the book.

Going viral on Telegram:

Boyfriend hasn’t accepted my LinkedIn request yet. He doesn’t want to connect. He doesn’t want to build.

Going viral on WhatsApp:

I am on a diet where you just speak Italian: “Pasta,” “Pizza,” and “I’m leaving Rooma for dessert.”

Seen just now on Messenger:

Dear Santa, Money!

Shared recently on Instagram:

Not to be dramatic, but when I accidentally save a file twice and it adds that (1) at the end, it is the worst moment of my life.

Going viral on WhatsApp:

Just a reminder that you’re not allowed to hit your coworkers. Even if they’re stupid. I asked. Twice.

Making waves on WhatsApp:

As a child, all I wanted was as to be a time traveller, like my grandson and his grandson before him.

Just landed via Reddit:

What if all the ancient Greek sculptures are actually victims of Medusa?

Shared recently on Threads:

Fun fact: Did you know that removing junk food from your diet can help you lose up to 90% of your will to live?

Freshly posted on Pinterest:

I’m a multi-tasking procrastinator. I can put off multiple things at once.

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Made with ❤️ in Sydney ☀️🌴