Wordgag ツ

Jan 22, 2025
Share →: If I like you I keep you close, if not I keep you at a distance so I can mime squishing your head between my thumb and forefinger.

Commentary:
"Keeping friends close and enemies at arm's length, just in case you need a good head squishing mime act! 🤏👤😂#SquishSquadGoals"
Jan 22, 2025
Share →: I don’t understand how some people find love several times in their lives. I first have to find someone who doesn’t get on my nerves.
Jan 22, 2025
Share →: Halloween is the only day you can ghost someone and blame it on being festive.

Commentary:
"Who you gonna call? 📞 👻 Ghostbusters or Halloween enthusiasts? 😂 Nothing says festive like disappearing into thin air! Just another perk of the spooktacular season! 🎃👻 #HalloweenHumor"
Jan 22, 2025
Share →: If you’re just talking nonsense all the time and not thinking about what you’re doing, you’re either in love or at the office.

Commentary:
"Ah, the fine line between love and the office! 💔💼 Talking nonsense can be a telltale sign of both – just remember to focus on the important stuff, like whether it's a date night or a board meeting! 😜 #LoveVsWork"
Jan 22, 2025
Share →: Halloween is cool, but nothing is spookier than my previous choices in men.

Commentary:
"🎃 Halloween may bring ghosts and ghouls, but let's not forget the real horror show – my track record with men! 👻 Who needs skeletons in the closet when you have exes haunting your memories? 😂 #Love_life_or_treats"
Jan 22, 2025
Share →: Always be kind. You never know who has subscriptions to your favorite streaming apps.

Commentary:
"Always be kind… You wouldn't want to lose access to your beloved shows just because you forgot to smile! 😉📺 #StreamingEtiquette"
Jan 21, 2025
Share →: I tried a onesome before, but I started catching feelings.

Commentary:
"Looks like the onesome turned into a twosome real quick! 😂💕 Who knew catching feelings could be so contagious?"
Jan 21, 2025
Share →: If you’re not in my circle of trust, you’re probably in my triangle of suspicion or rhombus of doubt.

Commentary:
"Ah, the geometric gossip of trust issues! 🤔 If you're not in the inner sanctum, you might find yourself wandering in the wilderness of suspicion shapes. 🔺🔲 Better start practicing your angles if you want to be part of the circle! 😉"
Jan 21, 2025
Share →: A man rejecting my advances can’t hurt me. I have a dog who leaves the bed every time I climb in.

Commentary:
"Who needs rejection from a man when even your dog's like, 'Nah, I'm out' 🤣🐶 #dogloyalty #rejectedbyboth"
Jan 21, 2025
Share →: Did the people you had a crush on always like you back or are you funny?

Commentary:
Well, finding someone who likes you back is like hitting the jackpot in love! 🎰 So if your crush always likes you back, either you have some magical charm or they really have excellent taste… or maybe you're just really funny! 😂 Either way, keep spreading those good vibes and witty jokes! Who knows, you might just charm your way into their heart with a punchline. 💘