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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇨🇾 has bookmarked:

All pants are tear away pants if you’re strong enough.

Someone from 🇦🇱 has viewed:

I’m so toxic, I can fight for a relationship I don’t even want.

Someone from 🇯🇵 has shared:

My favorite thing to do at the gym is stay home and eat a piece of cake.

Someone from 🇰🇭 has shared:

Movie date at my house, but we use pirated sites and spend all night closing pop-ups.

Someone from 🇰🇭 has downloaded:

I’m just here to make you wish I wasn’t.

Someone from 🇿🇲 has bookmarked:

I love the smell of freshly brewed delusions in the morning.

Someone from 🇱🇹 has bookmarked:

No HR complaint formed against me shall prosper.

Someone from 🇨🇱 has bookmarked:

Y’all ever withheld good news so that it remains untouched by negativity?

Someone from 🇨🇱 has downloaded:

Got fired on my first day working at the drugstore for calling my new coworkers ‘my pharmily’.

Someone from 🇲🇻 has bookmarked:

I have a condition where if I don’t walk as fast as humanly possible wherever I go, I will die. I’m like the bus in Speed.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

[monthly_post_count]

Funny Quotes Total

14,540

Funny Quotes Topics

16,780

Funny Quotes Images

14,540

Nov 26, 2025

3,753

Social Media Log 💫

Spotted on Slack:

My dog pisses on every election sign regardless of political party so I have no idea who he is voting for.

Breaking via Reddit:

I just finished cleaning the house for Thanksgiving, so if you’re looking for my family they’ll be in the backyard until Thursday.

Shared recently on Snapchat:

Somebody should market a beer called “Occasionally”. So when asked, I can say, “I only drink occasionally”.

Just shared via Messenger:

Nothing humbles me faster than my phone camera accidentally turning on.

Going viral on Twitch:

“Stop thinking about it.” Wow, thank you, I am cured. You should write a book.

Breaking via WhatsApp:

Instead of cleaning my house, I just watch episodes of hoarders on TV and then I think “Wow, my house looks awesome!”

Spotted on Twitch:

I’m not worried about shattering the illusion, I want to smash it to pieces.

Just shared via Threads:

You don’t scare me. I used to have to call and ask a girl’s parents if she was there.

Live now on Messenger:

Grammar is the difference between knowing your shit and knowing you’re shit.

Going viral on Twitch:

Whenever I’m willing to sell my soul, there’s usually food involved.

Home » Funny Social Media Quotes » Page 49

481 Funny social media quotes

More funny social media quotes 👇

4 months ago

Commentary:
Ah, the classic social media paradox: more fame, more stress, and more need for caffeine! ☕📱😅

attention, being, enjoy, enjoyment, experience, irony, less, media, online, online experience, social, social media, website

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Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

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Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

[monthly_post_count]

Funny Quotes Total

14,540

Funny Quotes Topics

16,780

Funny Quotes Images

14,540

Nov 26, 2025

3,916

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇧🇷 has viewed:

When I see chocolate, I hear two voices inside me. One says: “Eat it!”. The other says: “Did you hear that? You’re supposed to eat it!”

Someone from 🇾🇪 has copied:

Isn’t it odd that “read” is pronounced like “lead”, while “read” is pronounced like “lead”?

Someone from 🇹🇭 has bookmarked:

Sunday is proof that time travel exists, because it was just Friday.

Someone from 🇮🇳 has downloaded:

Babe, are you okay? You haven’t touched your dark humor all day.

Someone from 🇨🇻 has downloaded:

20s: LOL! 30s: OMG! 40s: WTF!

Someone from 🇹🇲 has shared:

My diet plan is sometimes, when I’m eating chips, I drop some on the floor, and I don’t eat those ones.

Someone from 🇦🇸 has downloaded:

Monday: The only day when you can wear the same outfit from the day before without anyone noticing.

Someone from 🇵🇦 has bookmarked:

Why is everyone against sugar? Who stood beside you when things went wrong and you were sad? It wasn’t lettuce, for sure.

Someone from 🇹🇯 has shared:

Hello 911? Yes, my wife is forcing me to walk over to meet the neighbors.

Someone from 🇮🇸 has copied:

Self-awareness is such a two-edged sword. Like, yay, I know myself better, but at what cost?

Social Media Log 💫

Making waves on Telegram:

I’m gonna start sending women unsolicited pizza pics.

Trending via TikTok:

Apparently, staying to yourself and not bothering people bothers people.

Freshly posted on Pinterest:

“Treat yourself. You deserve it,” she says while adding the shoes to her cart.

Just shared via Threads:

I’m giving up eating chocolate for a month. Sorry, bad punctuation. I’m giving up. Eating chocolate for a month.

Going viral on Pinterest:

Maybe I prefer my ducks scattered about.

Seen just now on Reddit:

I didn’t believe in karma until I was scheduled to work at 6am on a holiday.

Just landed via WeChat:

Friendly reminder that double negatives are a big no-no.

Just landed via Telegram:

Vanilla perfumes are so nice. It’s like walking into a bakery but you are the bakery.

Seen just now on Reddit:

Honestly, I don’t think I have any more new passwords left in me. You wanna steal my identity? Go ahead, I hope you enjoy debt and terrible posture.

Spotted on YouTube:

Sorry, I’m late. I sat on my bed in a towel for 45 minutes, staring at the wall.

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