Wordgag ツ

Jan 23, 2025
Share →: When someone asks me if my twins are natural, I tell them no they’re robots.

Commentary:
"Are your twins natural?" 🤖 Oh, no no, they're actually state-of-the-art, fully-functional robots! 🤖👶🤖 Who needs natural when you have technological wonders at home? 🤣 #RoboticParenting #TwinsOrTerminators
Jan 23, 2025
Share →: A tip for your next salary negotiation: simply tell your boss “either I get a pay rise or I go out and tell everyone I got one!”

Commentary:
"Brilliant idea! Nothing like a bit of friendly blackmail to spice up a salary negotiation! 💸😂 Just remember to wink and chuckle for extra impact! 😉 #NegotiationSkills"
Jan 23, 2025
Share →: Everyone is using AI to write business emails, texts, etc. At this point in time, we may as well just tell our AIs to talk to each other and then let us know what kind of deal they worked out.

Commentary:
🤖😂 "It's a brave new world out there when even our AIs are wheeling and dealing! 🤝 Who needs negotiation skills when we can just sit back and let the bots handle it? 💼💬 Just imagine the conversations our AIs are having behind our backs – probably gossiping about how inefficient we are! 😅 Let's hope they don't team up against us anytime soon! 🤖🤝"
Jan 23, 2025
Share →: Dr. Pepper just unseated Pepsi as the second most popular soda in America. Don’t tell me that getting your PhD isn’t worth it.

Commentary:
"Looks like Dr. Pepper is not just a sweet treat, but also a serious contender in the soda world! 🥤🎓 Who knew a PhD could be so refreshing and bubbly? Forget about thesis stress, bring on the fizzy success! 😉"
Jan 23, 2025
Share →: Always tell people different stories about yourself, so when they talk about you, they’ll argue.

Commentary:
"Spread your life tales like sprinkles on a cupcake 🧁. That way, when others gossip about you, they'll be debating which flavor is the juiciest! 🎤💬 #LifeOfMystery"
Jan 23, 2025
Share →: There is a house I drive by most days and I can never tell if they are having a yard sale or that is just how they live.

Commentary:
Looks like that house is keeping the neighborhood on its toes – is it a yard sale extravaganza or just everyday decor? 🏠🤔 Maybe they're just big fans of the "shabby chic" look! 😄
Jan 23, 2025
Share →: One day there will be condoms with Bluetooth that tell you whether you’re good in bed, how many calories you’ve burned and when the next train leaves.

Commentary:
Well, well, the future of safe sex just got a high-tech upgrade! 🚀🎉 Who knew condoms would one day double as personal trainers and travel agents? 🚂💪🏼 Just imagine the awkward conversations when your condom gives you feedback on your performance – "Sorry, buddy, you need to work on your stamina!" 😂 #FutureTechGoals #SmarterSex
Jan 22, 2025
Share →: You can use an egg timer to tell you when your egg is cooked perfectly. For brown rice you can use a calendar.

Commentary:
"Who knew cooking brown rice required a schedule 📆 while eggs just need a quick timer ⏲️? Brown rice be like 'Hold on, let me check my calendar before I get all chewy and clumpy!' 🍚🤣 #KitchenConundrums"
Jan 22, 2025
Share →: When the past calls, don’t answer it. It has nothing new to tell you.

Commentary:
"Ah, the past, always trying to slide back into your DMs like an old ex! 📞🚫 Don't give in – that book has been read cover to cover, dear past! 📖😄 Let's stay focused on the NOW and the NEXT chapter! 🚀🔮 #MovingForward"
Jan 22, 2025
Share →: “Slipping in the shower and trying to hold on to the water jet…” Shall I tell you more about myself?

Commentary:
"Slipping in the shower and trying to hold on to the water jet… sounds like a real whirlwind of a story! 🚿💦 Just when you think you've got a grip on life, it all washes away… Sure, go ahead and spill the sudsy details about yourself! 🤣🛁 #ShowerThoughts"