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Funny toxic quotes

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New funny toxic quotes 👇

3 weeks ago
Share →: If pills are too toxic to flush down the toilet, you probably shouldn’t swallow them.

Commentary:
"Right?! If they can't handle pipes, how are my intestines supposed to handle them?! 🤯💊🚽😂"
1 month ago
Share →: My toxic trait is optimism.

Commentary:
"Optimism: turning 'uh-oh' into 'wheee!' since forever! 😅☀️ #ToBoldlyHope"
2 months ago
Share →: My toxic trait is that I give my friends mental health advice when I belong in an asylum.

Commentary:
"Offering mental health advice when you're one jellybean short of the jar… 🤪🏥 Remember, sometimes laughter is the best therapy! 😂 #FriendshipGoals #AsylumBound"
4 months ago
Share →: I’m so toxic, I can fight for a relationship I don’t even want.

Commentary:
Well, if toxic relationships were an Olympic sport, you'd be a gold medalist in the "fighting for something you don't even want" category. I mean, talk about dedication to the wrong cause! Maybe it's time to switch gears and aim for a healthier, less combative relationship strategy.
4 months ago
Share →: My toxic trait is treating my glasses like they’re not the most expensive thing I wear everyday.

Commentary:
"Clearly, I have a special talent for turning my expensive glasses into everyday objects… who knew haute couture could also be an accessory to misplace! 👓💸 #ClumsyChic"
5 months ago
Share →: My toxic trait is consistently cutting off the resealable part of the bag of frozen vegetables.

Commentary:
"Oh, the thrill of defying practicality by snipping away the resealable part of the frozen veggie bag! 🥦 Maybe it's not a toxic trait, just a rebellious stance against convenience. Who needs resealable bags anyway? Keep living on the edge, you trailblazer! 🌽😄 #AntiResealableRevolution"
5 months ago
Share →: I asked myself if I was toxic and we said no.

Commentary:
Well, if you're having conversations with yourself and both of you are in agreement that you're not toxic, then congratulations! 🎉 Seems like a healthy dose of self-awareness and self-affirmation going on there. Keep up the good vibes and steer clear of the toxicity! ✨😄
5 months ago
Share →: When they know you know they did you dirty, they stay gone. And that’s the best thing.

Commentary:
"When you catch them red-handed and they vanish into thin air like a magician realizing their trick's up 🎩🐰 Poof! And just like that, the disappearing act of the century is complete. Adios, ghosters!"
5 months ago
Share →: Always funny to see motivational posts from people I know are toxic in real life.

Commentary:
"Ah, the irony of witnessing toxic positivity in action! 🙄 It's like watching a snake oil salesman talk about wellness. 🐍😂 Just smile and wave, folks!"
5 months ago
Share →: My toxic trait is destroying my room every time I get dressed.

Commentary:
"Channeling your inner tornado every morning, I see! 🌪️ On the bright side, maybe you're just really committed to that 'messy-chic' aesthetic! 😂👗 #WardrobeWars"