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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇰🇿 has viewed:

Due to rising prices, Dollar Tree is changing their name to ‘Tree Fiddy’.

Someone from 🇨🇱 has downloaded:

Coffee should be free for everyone Monday through Friday.

Someone from 🇮🇩 has downloaded:

Many men also have a walk-in closet. For them, it’s just called a floor.

Someone from 🇻🇨 has shared:

I don’t go crazy. I am crazy. I just go normal from time to time.

Someone from 🇰🇮 has viewed:

As I’m moonwalking away, they didn’t even notice I had stolen a brownie.

Someone from 🇻🇪 has viewed:

I’m optimistic, in a pessimistic way.

Someone from 🇨🇲 has copied:

Straighten your back and drink some water, you dehydrated banana.

Someone from 🇱🇨 has viewed:

If you ever get attacked by a shark, just be a good sport about it and let it eat you. Hey, look on the bright side: It’s a rare occurrence, so you’re special.

Someone from 🇲🇱 has bookmarked:

“Help us improve Instagram!” Nice try, fix your own damn website.

Someone from 🇦🇹 has bookmarked:

What if all the ancient Greek sculptures are actually victims of Medusa?

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

2326 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

12,488

Funny Quotes Topics

15,192

Funny Quotes Images

12,488

Updated

59 minutes ago

Users Online

3,446

Social Media Log 💫

Just landed via Threads:

I’ve literally never copied and pasted text and thought, “I’m so glad it kept the formatting and font from the other document.”

Making waves on WhatsApp:

If you see this, straighten your back, you banana-shaped mess.

Just landed via Threads:

If I’m not spoken to, my morning grumpiness goes almost unnoticed.

Making waves on LinkedIn:

I would cry but my makeup is too expensive.

Making waves on Facebook:

“Date” is just another word for: Jeez, had I known that before, I would have stayed home.

Just shared via Instagram:

Common sense isn’t a gift. It’s a punishment, because you have to deal with everyone who doesn’t have it.

Seen just now on WhatsApp:

Some people change their faces like traffic lights change their lights.

Trending via WeChat:

The reason I don’t trust polls is because the people being polled are people who willingly answer the phone when an unknown number is calling them.

Just landed via Telegram:

One thing I hate more than a liar is a liar that thinks I’m dumb.

Spotted on X:

I don’t need a recipe for disaster. I usually just eyeball it.

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Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

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activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

2326 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

12,488

Funny Quotes Topics

15,192

Funny Quotes Images

12,488

Updated

59 minutes ago

Users Online

3,458

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

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Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇨🇴 has shared:

Finally it’s Friday and I can go out. I’m putting the garbage out and I’ll be right back.

Someone from 🇷🇼 has copied:

Can’t. Too busy saving daylight.

Someone from 🇸🇬 has viewed:

People are too casual about the fact that parrots can talk.

Someone from 🇨🇬 has copied:

We can do things two ways. My way or the right way.

Someone from 🇻🇨 has copied:

Ever since I was a little girl I knew I wanted to leave work early.

Someone from 🇵🇦 has downloaded:

Rom-com idea: Gozilla +1. Godzilla gets invited to a wedding but struggles to convince anyone to go with him.

Someone from 🇧🇿 has viewed:

Being a woman is hard. You always want to buy something, slap someone, lose weight and eat something sweet.

Someone from 🇸🇿 has bookmarked:

When your name is Jenn, people think it’s short for Jennifer, but it’s really short for Jennatalia.

Someone from 🇱🇨 has viewed:

Accidentally became important at work and it’s ruining my life.

Someone from 🇸🇾 has shared:

Screw you guys, I’m gonna go make friends with the crows.

Social Media Log 💫

Trending via Instagram:

Women love it when you approach them on the street and say “whoa, is there a hot babe convention in town?”

Just shared via Reddit:

Can’t, I’m pulling it together.

Seen just now on X:

I am simply too intelligent to be happy.

Seen just now on TikTok:

I really love playing chess with elderly people in the park, but it’s just really hard to find thirty-two of them willing to do it.

Shared recently on Snapchat:

If ads were a person, it would be that one neighbor who won’t stop talking to you at the most inconvenient of times.

Shared recently on Instagram:

Due to not wanting to, I will not be.

Spotted on WeChat:

The trash gets picked up tomorrow. Be ready.

Freshly posted on YouTube:

It’s so hot to me when a man has a poorly run Instagram account.

Just shared via Threads:

Sleeping nakey nakey nakey just in case Santa wants a different type of cookie tonight.

Spreading quickly via Instagram:

Bacon should be free for anyone having a bad day.

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