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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇰🇮 has copied:

What is Washington’s plan to make everything bagels less messy to eat?

Someone from 🇯🇵 has shared:

“Some men go months without being hugged.” Okay, then they should just hug each other.

Someone from 🇩🇴 has downloaded:

Girls these days are like a box of chocolates. Some have nuts.

Someone from 🇰🇼 has shared:

There is a giant spider on my dash so I’m going to have to buy a new car now.

Someone from 🇯🇲 has bookmarked:

The only thing longer than the opening ceremony of the Olympics is the opening ceremony of my eyes in the morning.

Someone from 🇸🇱 has copied:

I don’t know who needs to hear this but you’re not dying, it’s just Monday.

Someone from 🇦🇴 has shared:

Cancel culture has been canceled.

Someone from 🇧🇼 has copied:

I forgot my password, failed the captcha and have been accused of being a robot. I don’t even know how to fight these allegations.

Someone from 🇧🇧 has bookmarked:

There’s a Marie Antoinette feeling in the air.

Someone from 🇧🇬 has viewed:

Come on, brain, release the happy chemicals.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

824 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,986

Funny Quotes Topics

13,930

Funny Quotes Images

10,986

Updated

11 minutes ago

Users Online

3,428

Social Media Log 💫

Going viral on Slack:

Just walked by an empath and his head exploded.

Live now on Discord:

Dear God, thank you for the job I have. But if you have a lottery win planned for me, I’m ready! Thank you.

Going viral on WeChat:

Someone in their late 20s giving advice to someone in their early 20s is exactly like when a toddler is obsessed with a newborn.

Broadcasted on Pinterest:

Be the reason your therapist reevaluates their entire career.

Going viral on WhatsApp:

I yelled at my cat and the other cats yelled at me. Like wow, okay, pay my mortgage then.

Freshly posted on Facebook:

This meeting could have been an unread email.

Making waves on Facebook:

Too many toilets have automatically flushed underneath me for me not to have reservations about self-driving cars.

Spotted on Telegram:

Pet owners be like “this is my pet Snoopy, but their nicknames are Booboo and Thicky Boy!”

Shared recently on Facebook:

Nothing tastes as good as skinny feels.

Shared recently on X:

I hate small cars that disguise themselves as free parking spaces and drop their masks as soon as you pull up in front of them.

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Funny work phone quotes

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All funny work phone quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

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Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

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activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm sleep social someone technology time want work

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

824 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,986

Funny Quotes Topics

13,930

Funny Quotes Images

10,986

Updated

11 minutes ago

Users Online

3,423

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇸🇷 has viewed:

My 3 weeks without sweets were over after 12 hours. Proof that time runs faster with increasing age.

Someone from 🇳🇵 has copied:

You are the Monday of my life.

Someone from 🇦🇹 has downloaded:

A guy in the parking lot saw me trip over my own feet so I yelled to him “I just quantum leaped into this body!”

Someone from 🇸🇳 has copied:

If I’m reading my Twitter feed correctly, Jennifer Aniston killed JFK.

Someone from 🇲🇺 has copied:

At the end of my appointment, the doctor took her own blood pressure.

Someone from 🇱🇹 has copied:

Dear diary, sorry for only ever talking about myself. How are you? Do you have any hobbies?

Someone from 🇸🇩 has viewed:

My parents told me I could be anything I wanted so I became unacceptable.

Someone from 🇧🇬 has viewed:

Vegan zombies be like: GRAINS!

Someone from 🇹🇷 has viewed:

Maybe this is the Windows software update that changes everything for me.

Someone from 🇨🇩 has downloaded:

It’s not my job to police the internet, but I just saw someone post a recipe for cauliflower cookies and reported them for harmful content.

Social Media Log 💫

Trending via Instagram:

I always knew I’d get old. How fast it happened was a bit of a surprise though.

Just shared via Twitch:

I dunno what I did in a past life but holy crap I’m sorry.

Spreading quickly via Twitch:

My reality check bounced, guess I’ll have to stay insane for the time being.

Seen just now on Discord:

Sitting on the middle seat of this flight and both my seatmates are reading my book over my shoulder. Should I just start reading it aloud?

Seen just now on Pinterest:

If I ever win the lottery and decide to invest in a billboard company, I won’t tell anyone; but there will be signs.

Just shared via Twitch:

I’m a social media influencer in that I’ve influenced people to ignore me on social media.

Just shared via Slack:

If I’m ever in a coma, please put chapstick on my lips.

Seen just now on Messenger:

A treadmill minute is four times as long as a sleep minute.

Going viral on Telegram:

Damaged inside, but outside we keep it gangsta.

Just landed via Facebook:

Being single is so crazy. What do you mean there’s No One?

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