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Someone from 🇳🇦 has viewed:

Inventing the Grinch: “Santa needs a Wario!”

Someone from 🇸🇳 has bookmarked:

OnlyFans, but it’s elderly women teaching you how to sew, knit, can food, quilt, and some solid recipes. OnlyGrans.

Someone from 🇸🇬 has downloaded:

Do you also sometimes turn on the TV just so you have background noise or am I weird?

Someone from 🇨🇷 has copied:

Girls be like “forget it, I’m fine” then set your house on fire.

Someone from 🇧🇴 has copied:

Love Island is fun, but when is Job Island on?

Someone from 🇻🇳 has viewed:

Cooking your own meals really is the best way to devote 50 hours of your life every month to save $50.

Someone from 🇸🇬 has copied:

Why would I get married when it’s a well-known fact that only 50% of all marriages end in divorce?

Someone from 🇸🇻 has copied:

Hold music is annoyingly scratchy and repetitive on purpose, so you will hang up and stop bothering them.

Someone from 🇲🇼 has downloaded:

I feel so bad when I overtake an old person on the sidewalk. Like, man, I really didn’t mean to flex on you with my youthful stride.

Someone from 🇬🇲 has viewed:

How many sit-ups do I have to do before I get a six-pack? Please say 5.

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Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,640

Social Media Log 💫

Broadcasted on Reddit:

They need to invent a job for people who aren’t good at anything nor motivated nor social.

Spotted on WhatsApp:

Anyone else smile at old people just to show that you’re one of the good ones.

Going viral on YouTube:

Thinking after a concert that the artist liked your city/show the most is like thinking the bartender flirted with you.

Freshly posted on WeChat:

I be outside telling people I don’t got social media when they ask.

Live now on Snapchat:

May life treat you exactly the same way you treat servers, store clerks, senior citizens, children, and animals.

Trending via WhatsApp:

How lazy are you?” I greet people by raising my eyebrows.

Seen just now on Telegram:

Aura is the real business card.

Making waves on Threads:

Need to win the lottery so I can focus on going to museums and working out.

Making waves on Twitch:

Scientists say humans are the most evolved, but bears get to get fat all summer and then sleep for four months, so who’s really ahead.

Live now on Facebook:

I left the house with wet hair and no makeup on, so I’m sure I’ll run into everyone I know.

I could have been the favorite mistress of the Sun King at Versailles, but nooooooooo I had to be born into late stage capitalism.

3 weeks ago

Funny Quotes

Witty quote about choosing royal favor over modern capitalism's chaos.

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Commentary:
"Talk about bad luck! 😂 Bet living in a palace beats dealing with capitalism any day. 🏰☀️ #FirstWorldProblems"

born, capitalism, choices, disappointment, favorite, historical, historical reference, humor, i, irony, king, late, life, life choices, mistress, reference, stage, sun, Sun King, Versailles

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45 shares on Instagram this month:

I don’t want to alarm anyone, but my doctor says I have an irreversible terminal condition called aging.

25 shares on Reddit this month:

Honestly, I don’t think I have any more new passwords left in me. You wanna steal my identity? Go ahead, I hope you enjoy debt and terrible posture.

61 shares on Threads this month:

Oasis didn’t just write good songs. They wrote the soundtrack for a whole generation.

89 shares on TikTok this month:

Stop telling everyone I’m posting from earth. People don’t need to know where I live.

68 shares on LinkedIn this month:

What do you mean I overthink things (as I wonder if I hurt my dog’s feelings by liking cat videos on Instagram)?

31 shares on TikTok this month:

It seems really unfair that my future depends on me.

47 shares on YouTube this month:

I swear some songs have background noises of your mum shouting your name from downstairs.

33 shares on WeChat this month:

Sex without love is a meaningless experience, but as far as meaningless experiences go its pretty damn good.

42 shares on Instagram this month:

I’m not fat. I just eat in advance.

79 shares on Messenger this month:

To me, essential oils are what drips out of tacos.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇺🇾 has downloaded:

They give smokers all those breaks to make up for the time taken off their lifespan.

Someone from 🇱🇸 has downloaded:

Relationships are only serious when photos are posted by a man.

Someone from 🇫🇷 has copied:

Sometimes, I feel like I need love, but the moment I finish eating, I realize I was just hungry.

Someone from 🇨🇱 has copied:

I’m fighting for free speech. Mine, not yours, so be quiet.

Someone from 🇳🇮 has shared:

If you want to know what God thinks of money, look at the people he gave it to.

Someone from 🇦🇴 has shared:

“I’m too pretty for this” is a very valid excuse, actually.

Someone from 🇲🇿 has viewed:

Just because I’m smiling doesn’t mean I like you, I might be picturing you on fire.

Someone from 🇼🇸 has bookmarked:

What is it called when you were overthinking, and it turns out you were right?

Someone from 🇩🇲 has downloaded:

3 friends is enough. 1 for the movie theater, 1 for drinks and apps, 1 for texting concerning mental health information.

Someone from 🇮🇱 has downloaded:

Sometimes I look deep into my colleagues’ eyes to check if you really can’t see the back of their skulls.

Social Media Log 💫

Shared recently on YouTube:

Starting the second half of your sandwich is like “hell yeah, baby, let’s run it back!”

Making waves on Pinterest:

I used to have this mental illness, where I thought logical arguments would change someone’s mind.

Freshly posted on Reddit:

I would like to be reincarnated as less tired.

Making waves on Slack:

I refuse to listen to anyone give commentary on the state of society unless it’s in a TikTok video filmed inside their car.

Just landed via Discord:

The hairdresser asking me what special plans I have for the day like this wasn’t it.

Seen just now on YouTube:

I’ve discovered that my visiting family members leave crumbs in the butter. Please keep me in your thoughts during this difficult time.

Shared recently on WeChat:

If your store’s bowl of water is just for pets, you should really put up a sign.

Making waves on Threads:

Why do they call it a garage sale instead of a garbage sale?

Going viral on X:

Christmas decor isn’t meant to be sleek and minimalist, it is supposed to look like joy threw up in your house.

Making waves on Messenger:

Getting a random boner is a bit funny. Like, what is it, boy? What do you see?

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I could have been the favorite mistress of the Sun King at Versailles, but nooooooooo I had to be born into late stage capitalism.

I’m stuck between “I need to save money” and “You only live once.”

The ideal man is always thinking of several cool things at once (throwing a football really far, a truck with big wheels, giving a lot of high fives).

I be telling people, “I respect your decision,” and I really don’t. The decision is always something stupid, and I just don’t want to engage any further.

Too many types of pasta. I can say my fav is Fliccaroni and not one of you can be sure if it’s real. Look at you googling it.

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Activity Log ✨

I could have been the favorite mistress of the Sun King at Versailles, but nooooooooo I had to be born into late stage capitalism.

Keep the laugh going 😂

Stop bothering me, or I will inform you of a behavioral pattern that is noticeable to other people, but I can tell you are not yet aware of.

I’m stuck between “I need to save money” and “You only live once.”

The ideal man is always thinking of several cool things at once (throwing a football really far, a truck with big wheels, giving a lot of high fives).

I like to describe the difference between theory and practice with shopping lists and receipts.

I be telling people, “I respect your decision,” and I really don’t. The decision is always something stupid, and I just don’t want to engage any further.

Too many types of pasta. I can say my fav is Fliccaroni and not one of you can be sure if it’s real. Look at you googling it.

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