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Commentary:
"Ah, a true expert in the art of self-destruction! 🎭 Who needs GPS when you've got your own special way of finding the rocky road? 🛣️ Just remember to wear a hard hat on your journey to chaos! 🚧🤦‍♂️"

advice, am, capable, humor, i, independence, life, need, own, ruining, sarcasm

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

I think some of you are faking your sarcasms.

0

2 months ago

faking, humor, i, sarcasm, think
The only time your man will surprise you is when you specifically tell him what you want.

0

2 months ago

communication, expectations, humor, man, relationship, surprise, tell, time, want
This book ain’t got no pictures.

0

2 months ago

book, got, humor, joke, pictures, reading, sarcasm
My morning yoga routine has really helped shift my lower back pain into my upper back.

0

2 months ago

back, back pain, exercise, flexibility, health, humor, irony, morning, morning routine, pain, routine, upper, yoga
It’s so hot outside that when I opened my front door I thought I was checking on my oven.

0

2 months ago

checking, door, front, front door, heat, hot, i, outside, oven, summer, thought, weather
Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice? Also shame on you. Stop foolin’ me, I am pure.

0

3 months ago

am, fool, honesty, humor, i, joke, me, once, pure, purity, shame, stop, trust, twice

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

🎉🥂 New Year Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

74 shares on Slack this month:

I hate when I grab a live wire and everyone sees my damn skeleton.

16 shares on Messenger this month:

I got bills. They’re multiplying.

69 shares on Threads this month:

I kind of miss when people stood 6 feet away.

40 shares on X this month:

It’s not my fault that when I said you looked “stunning” you assumed I meant in a positive way.

32 shares on Discord this month:

In a parallel universe, there’s a happy me.

16 shares on Threads this month:

Deciding if I should heal or just give up and go completely insane.

54 shares on Messenger this month:

When you have finished reading this funny quote, you will be a little closer to death than before.

56 shares on WeChat this month:

Dear autocorrect, that’s not what I was trying to say. I’m getting tired of your shirt.

44 shares on TikTok this month:

What happened to the art of just liking one person?

68 shares on Reddit this month:

I’m officially at the age where I’m not upgrading my phone until it stops working.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇳🇵 has downloaded:

I’ve been called a lot of things in my life, but nothing worse than being called on the phone.

Someone from 🇷🇺 has shared:

Opening the web before 9am is crazy. Like, did you even try to have a good day?

Someone from 🇨🇱 has copied:

You know it’s a fancy restaurant when you have to point at what you want on the menu because you can’t pronounce the name.

Someone from 🇱🇾 has copied:

The word “misread” can be misread as “misread.”

Someone from 🇦🇱 has shared:

Studies show young people are having less sex than previous generations. I knew I was ahead of my time.

Someone from 🇹🇬 has downloaded:

It’s all fun and games until you send the clapping emoji instead of the prayer hands when commenting on the news of a death in the family.

Someone from 🇱🇺 has shared:

People shouldn’t be at the grocery store the same time as me. Get out of the way.

Someone from 🇲🇭 has shared:

Do you ever think back about all the crazy stuff you did when you were younger, and wonder how you’re still alive?

Someone from 🇫🇯 has shared:

The longest and most adventurous journeys begin with the words: “I know a shortcut.”

Someone from 🇲🇱 has bookmarked:

Men call us “gold diggers” when we expect them to pay for a meal. Honey, a gold digger goes after yachts, not a piece of chicken.

Social Media Log 💫

Trending via Pinterest:

I’m not exaggerating when I say, if I ever clogged a toilet at work, I would immediately quit, change my name, and then move to a different city.

Just shared via TikTok:

What is that job called where you put the little stickers on fruit? I think I would be good at that.

Spotted on Pinterest:

After ejaculation, men automatically realize that everything is vanity upon vanity.

Going bananas on Pinterest:

It was me, I let the dogs out.

Going bananas on WeChat:

Satan: “Would you please stop sacrificing animals to me. I’m not running a zoo down here.”

Live now on Snapchat:

My comments on your home decor are not criticisms, they are deep concerns.

Going bananas on TikTok:

Scrolling… good take… bad take… nothing take… cyberbullying… beautiful woman.

Freshly posted on X:

I just want what every middle-aged person wants: to remember what it was that I wanted.

Breaking via WhatsApp:

With great power comes a great electricity bill.

Going bananas on Facebook:

That incredible ability of cats to only throw up on carpeted floors.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

I don’t need your flipping advice, I am capable of ruining my life on my own.

Related Funny Quotes 🤝

I think some of you are faking your sarcasms.

The only time your man will surprise you is when you specifically tell him what you want.

This book ain’t got no pictures.

My morning yoga routine has really helped shift my lower back pain into my upper back.

It’s so hot outside that when I opened my front door I thought I was checking on my oven.

Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice? Also shame on you. Stop foolin’ me, I am pure.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨