Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇳🇱 has bookmarked:

I know that we aren’t supposed to self diagnose but I’ve googled all of my symptoms and I’m fairly sure I’m a raccoon.

Someone from 🇬🇪 has shared:

If you like someone, set them free. If they comeback, it means nobody liked them. Set them free again.

Someone from 🇱🇮 has downloaded:

Instagram is just Twitter for people who go outside.

Someone from 🇧🇯 has viewed:

Stop checking your phone every minute. No one loves you.

Someone from 🇹🇩 has downloaded:

There’s a guy who thinks he’s going to Yale, but it’s jail.

Someone from 🇳🇬 has viewed:

If you know karate, you shouldn’t have to pay for stuff.

Someone from 🇧🇭 has bookmarked:

I would like even faster food.

Someone from 🇾🇪 has viewed:

Ever since I learned the show is called Suits because of lawsuits and not because they wear suits, I have harbored a hot white rage within me beyond anything mankind has ever known.

Someone from 🇿🇦 has bookmarked:

Maturing is realizing you’re not stable enough to do mushrooms.

Someone from 🇲🇭 has copied:

I hope I find $10,000 on the floor later.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

2405 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

12,567

Funny Quotes Topics

15,241

Funny Quotes Images

12,567

49 minutes ago

3,438

Social Media Log 💫

Seen just now on WeChat:

“Cut my life into pieces” screamed the earthworm and threw itself in front of my spade.

Trending via YouTube:

I love when I come home, I put on my Adam Sandler clothes.

Shared recently on Reddit:

“We should get tickets” is as close to a rock concert as I get these days.

Making waves on Messenger:

I don’t freak out until I see the Buddhists freaking out.

Seen just now on Telegram:

In the 90s, you could tell who won the rap battle by who was still alive.

Seen just now on Snapchat:

Having no one to talk would get you a good sleeping schedule.

Freshly posted on Twitch:

Twitter is fun because you can tweet about hashbrowns and someone will say you are responsible for genocide.

Live now on Pinterest:

Hear me out. What if we don’t elect another president, and we all just promise to be really good?

Shared recently on WeChat:

Cleaning the kitchen, but saw the laundry, so I watered a plant, and now I’m making a dentist appointment.

Seen just now on LinkedIn:

The easiest way to bundle your home and auto insurance is to live in your car.

I don’t understand how I can remember every word of a song from 1984, but I can’t remember why I walked into the kitchen.

4 months ago

I don’t understand how I can remember every word of a song from 1984, but I can’t remember why I walked into the kitchen.

Download image ↓

Commentary:
Ah, the mysterious workings of the human brain – a vault of '80s lyrics and a black hole for daily tasks. It's like your mind is stuck on repeat for "Wake Me Up Before You Go-Go" but on shuffle when it comes to why you went to the kitchen in the first place. Perhaps your brain is secretly channeling its inner rockstar instead of focusing on groceries!

1984, forgetfulness, humor, irony, kitchen, memory, nostalgia, song, word

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

New Funny Quotes

Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

Trending Topics 📁

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

2405 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

12,567

Funny Quotes Topics

15,241

Funny Quotes Images

12,567

49 minutes ago

3,460

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇻🇪 has downloaded:

I love how bananas just take over the whole smoothie. You can never dim her light.

Someone from 🇰🇲 has downloaded:

Just blocked all the normal people, so if you see this… sup, weirdo.

Someone from 🇱🇷 has bookmarked:

Please stop adding touchscreens to cars. Most of these idiots can barely drive as it is.

Someone from 🇪🇷 has copied:

Reoccurring dreams be like: ‘I dunno, here’s a rerun’

Someone from 🇦🇸 has copied:

You try to fart in the toilet in the morning without waking the whole house and thanks to the brilliant acoustics of the toilet bowl, the horn of Gondor sounds.

Someone from 🇷🇼 has copied:

To my beloved wife, I leave my circus and my monkeys.

Someone from 🇲🇲 has downloaded:

My boss told me to start every presentation with a joke. The first slide was my paycheck.

Someone from 🇦🇷 has downloaded:

Vanilla perfumes are so nice. It’s like walking into a bakery but you are the bakery.

Someone from 🇧🇫 has copied:

If you ever need me, call me any time, day or night, and I’ll return your call when I get around to it.

Someone from 🇸🇴 has shared:

Nobody warns you of the devastation two days of stuffing will bring upon your digestive system.

Social Media Log 💫

Just landed via Twitch:

Hello 911? Yes, my wife is forcing me to walk over to meet the neighbors.

Going viral on YouTube:

What is rizz if not swag persevering?!

Shared recently on Threads:

You don’t see people giving bunny ears in photos anymore.

Just landed via Messenger:

There is no sex. I lied. You are gonna lay here and take personality quizzes with me.

Spotted on Facebook:

I walk around like everything’s fine, but deep down, inside my shoe, my sock is sliding off.

Spreading quickly via Twitch:

If I’m not spoken to, my morning grumpiness goes almost unnoticed.

Freshly posted on Threads:

I don’t think I’d be so scared of spiders if they had eight tiny flip flops on.

Shared recently on Facebook:

“It is what it is,” I say, not really knowing what it actually is.

Spreading quickly via Twitch:

My skin is so dry it’s doing a PowerPoint presentation.

Making waves on Snapchat:

People who think they know everything are a great annoyance to those of us who do.

Share Wordgag 🙏

© 2025. All rights reserved.

Made with ❤️ in Sydney ☀️🌴