Wordgag ツ

Commentary:
"If you're going to say sorry, make sure it's accompanied by some dough – because 'I'm sorry' just doesn't quite cut it when you're talking to my bank account!"

apology, cash, humor, i, payment, sarcasm, worth

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

Bought an eggplant, imma grow my own eggs.

2 months ago

eggplant, eggs, food, gardening, grow, humor, own, pun
“OMG I love your personality,” thanks, it’s a disorder.

6 months ago

compliment, disorder, humor, i, love, OMG, personality, sarcasm, thanks
Life is like a box of chocolates. More expensive than I was expecting.

2 months ago

box, chocolate, comparison, expectation, expensive, humor, i, life
My comments on your home decor are not criticisms, they are deep concerns.

6 months ago

comment, comments, concern, concerns, criticism, decor, deep, home, home decor, humor
Happiness is an inside job.

5 months ago

happiness, inside, inside job, job, mindset, positivity, self
People really be like, “I would never do that to you,” and then do it with a remix.

2 months ago

betrayal, deception, friendship, honesty, humor, hypocrisy, i, never, people, remix

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

79 shares on WeChat this month:

Wife asked if I could stop singing Wonderwall. I said maybe…

15 shares on LinkedIn this month:

Welcome to your 40s—you run out of breath trying to find your running shoes.

38 shares on X this month:

Nice to finally get back that hour they stole earlier this year.

15 shares on Telegram this month:

People who own banana costumes will wear that shit to anything.

62 shares on Twitch this month:

I wanna date one of those guys who really loves their girlfriend.

66 shares on Reddit this month:

“Oh, I’d love to but I can’t.” Translation: I don’t want to so I won’t.

92 shares on WeChat this month:

Bitcoin is just Kohl’s Cash for boys.

29 shares on Messenger this month:

Old age is like a glorious, extended long weekend, but you always know Monday’s coming.

47 shares on Pinterest this month:

Just got diagnosed with needing a hot chocolate with extra marshmallows.

31 shares on YouTube this month:

I like liking Instagram stories because I like pressing buttons.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇨🇾 has bookmarked:

I’m saving money on rent by moving into an abandoned cobweb.

Someone from 🇱🇮 has copied:

Waking up early is cool until it starts feeling like you’ve had a long day at 10 a.m.

Someone from 🇩🇴 has bookmarked:

I would like to thank everyone who destroyed me into the person I am today.

Someone from 🇿🇲 has shared:

Only time I believe a man is when he tells me that I’m pretty.

Someone from 🇷🇼 has bookmarked:

I know so many people with cats, and only a tiny number of them went to a shelter and picked out a cat. Everyone else I know with a cat has a story that’s like, ‘Yeah, he just moved in.’

Someone from 🇸🇮 has downloaded:

The circus does not condone the actions being taken by its monkeys.

Someone from 🇵🇦 has shared:

It’s always fun listening to someone’s lie when you already know the truth.

Someone from 🇮🇹 has downloaded:

Love is in the air, but so is the flu. Wash your hands!

Someone from 🇧🇳 has shared:

I accidentally bought a pair of nose-cancelling headphones and now my glasses keep falling off.

Someone from 🇨🇱 has bookmarked:

You couldn’t pay me to do this year again.

Social Media Log 💫

Spotted on Snapchat:

I don’t really like the song “I’ve Got a Feeling” by Black Eyed Peas, but I just like the part where they say “Mazel Tov.”

Broadcasted on Instagram:

The only thing I don’t miss about the 90s is people smelling like cigarettes.

Spotted on Twitch:

My favorite body lotion is Voltaren.

Spreading quickly via Threads:

Hate how quietly iPhones die. At 5% it should start verbally begging for its life.

Going viral on WhatsApp:

This meeting could have been an unread email.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

I only accept apologies in cash.

Related Funny Posts 🤝

Bought an eggplant, imma grow my own eggs.

“OMG I love your personality,” thanks, it’s a disorder.

Life is like a box of chocolates. More expensive than I was expecting.

My comments on your home decor are not criticisms, they are deep concerns.

Happiness is an inside job.

People really be like, “I would never do that to you,” and then do it with a remix.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨