Trendy Funny Quotes

  • This could have been an email. Me, while attending a wedding ceremony.
  • My doctor told me to eat more Taco Bell. Well, he actually said “less McDonald’s”, but I’m pretty sure I know what he meant.
  • Got asked to be a godparent, proving God has lowered his recruitment standards.
  • “Excuse me, are you gonna finish those fries?” Me, interrupting a couple fighting.
  • My toxic trait is destroying my room every time I get dressed.
  • I never make the same mistake twice. I make it three four times, you know, just to be sure!