I think nervous flatulence would be helpful if you were ever kidnapped.

Someone from 🇸🇮 has bookmarked:

I set up my Nativity scene, but since baby Jesus hasn’t arrived yet, Mary, Joseph and all the Wise Men are just looking down at their phones.

Someone from 🇦🇱 has bookmarked:

Born to say “Who the hell raised you to be this stupid.” Forced to work in groups.

Someone from 🇪🇨 has bookmarked:

It should be illegal to take a nap and still have a headache when you wake up. Like, no, I shut it off and back on again. Why are you still here?

Someone from 🇩🇰 has downloaded:

If you catch me smiling at you, chances are I am plotting my revenge.

Someone from 🇷🇺 has downloaded:

Any house is an Airbnb if you’re quiet enough.

Someone from 🇧🇭 has downloaded:

Whenever I see an athlete eating quark, I get sad, because the quark could have been turned into cheesecake.

Someone from 🇸🇳 has viewed:

Deeply unfair of people to assume I have my life together just because I’m boring.

Someone from 🇱🇨 has viewed:

I’m glad the makers removed all the unnecessary sex scenes from my life, so I can focus on character development.

Someone from 🇳🇵 has viewed:

You are born, you lie about how you are and then you die.

Someone from 🇦🇺 has shared:

And then I thought to myself, “What’s the point of cleaning if my family is going to keep living here?”