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Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ต๐Ÿ‡น has bookmarked:

I just want to be rich enough to stop having to pretend that Iโ€™m getting work done.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡จ๐Ÿ‡ญ has viewed:

If a dog growled at me, I would try to understand where theyโ€™re coming from.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡น๐Ÿ‡ฉ has downloaded:

English is so fake. How can you drink a drink, but you can’t food a food?

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡น๐Ÿ‡ฑ has copied:

Why do babies stare at you like they know you from somewhere?

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ฌ๐Ÿ‡ณ has copied:

Twitter account so good even HR wants to see it.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡จ๐Ÿ‡ป has downloaded:

Gravity called. Itโ€™s sick of holding me up.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ฌ๐Ÿ‡ช has downloaded:

Hey beauty brands who make face creams: 30ml is only enough for an antโ€™s face.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ณ๐Ÿ‡ท has downloaded:

I donโ€™t like this new trend of old people wearing shirts of bands I listened to when I was a kid.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ธ๐Ÿ‡จ has copied:

Can I be 20 again? I know what to do this time.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡จ๐Ÿ‡ฑ has viewed:

Babe, are you okay? You’ve barely touched your unread books.

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I tried being the bigger person but all it got me was type 2 diabetes.

I tried being the bigger person but all it got me was type 2 diabetes.

Commentary:
"Who knew taking the high road could lead to the high sugar levels? ๐Ÿฆ๐Ÿฐ Next time, it's okay to be the 'sweet' person instead! ๐Ÿ˜‰ #SugarRush #LifeLessons"



Welcome to Wordgag! ๐Ÿ˜‰โœŒ๏ธ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. ๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ’ฅ

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Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ธ๐Ÿ‡ฑ has shared:

Coconut water taste like it’s been in someone else’s mouth.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ง๐Ÿ‡ด has viewed:

I aspire to be a stay-at-home mom with no kids.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡น๐Ÿ‡ฒ has bookmarked:

The only difference between hungry and horny is where you insert the cucumber.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ฌ๐Ÿ‡ง has shared:

Vote for me and I will halve the calories in chocolate.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ฒ๐Ÿ‡ฉ has viewed:

I overthink, therefore I am.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡จ๐Ÿ‡ป has viewed:

If I was an elephant, you’d all be sorry.

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And then I thought to myself, “What’s the point of cleaning if my family is going to keep living here?”

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ป๐Ÿ‡บ has copied:

Dude, weโ€™re biting off more than we can chew tonight if you want to pull up.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ฐ๐Ÿ‡ณ has bookmarked:

One pretty important part of being a dad is walking faster than the rest of your family through an airport.

Someone from ๐Ÿ‡ธ๐Ÿ‡ป has downloaded:

The Welsh language was invented by a dad losing at Scrabble.