Trendy Funny Quotes

  • Be so funny that everyone forgets that you are ugly!
  • I had the most impatient and rudest cashier. I’m never using self-checkout again.
  • Counting calories is a great way to combine super fun things like math and not eating.
  • I am the proud father of two content providers. I mean children. Two children.
  • The History Channel, because where else are you going to learn about how aliens were instrumental in the development of humanity?
  • We all have needs. I need my wife to go run errands so I can swipe the last donut.