Wordgag 🎅

Commentary:
"Sounds like you're taking 'unwinding' to a whole new level! 🤪 Perhaps it's time to switch from decomposing to decompressing…less mess, more zen! 🧘‍♂️"

decompose, decompress, humor, i, relaxation, stress, work

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

Has anybody else completely lost it or is it just me and Kanye?

0

2 months ago

celebrity, crisis, else, health, humor, identity, identity crisis, just, Kanye, lost, lost it, me, mental, mental health, relatable
I get shy when my man stares at me for too long because what if he’s realizing I’m actually a lil ugly.

0

2 months ago

humor, i, insecurity, man, me, relationship, self-esteem, shy, stare, ugly
Please don’t flirt with me. I’m trying not to cheat on my crush who doesn’t like me.

0

2 months ago

cheat, comedy, crush, dating, flirt, humor, love, me, relationship, trying, unrequited, unrequited love
It was so hot today, I thought I was going to be cremated.

0

2 months ago

cremated, exaggeration, going, heat, hot, humor, i, joke, summer, temperature, thought, today
People that tell us what sex gods they are, what do you want us to do with that information?

0

1 month ago

communication, confidence, God, humor, information, people, relationship, sex, sex god, tell, want
Me: “I should treat myself to something.” My bank account: “Dream on.”

0

2 months ago

account, bank, bank account, dream, finances, humor, i, me, money, myself, self-care, should, something, spending, treat

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

🎁🎅🎄 Christmas Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

97 shares on Reddit this month:

I’m at the age where, if you ask me to go out after 9 p.m., I’m definitely not coming.

14 shares on Messenger this month:

“I’m fluent in creating worst-case scenarios in my head.”

94 shares on Slack this month:

I deal with my personal problems the same way I study for tests, I don’t.

84 shares on X this month:

Life is too short. Tell his mom what he did to you.

38 shares on YouTube this month:

I could never be an Instagram mom influencer. For starters, I wouldn’t be able to give my kids a name like Banjo or Parmesan or Chandelier.

21 shares on Telegram this month:

I can understand why chickens wake up and scream.

11 shares on YouTube this month:

I’m not afraid of ghosts because everyone who’s mad at me is still alive.

44 shares on YouTube this month:

Hello! I’m Britain’s greatest spy and my catchphrase is: I tell you my real surname, then my real forename, then my real surname again, in case you missed it.

23 shares on Discord this month:

By now, we’ve all figured out that these LED bulbs don’t actually last 15 years, but we’ve collectively decided to just let it slide.

34 shares on Slack this month:

Getting so tangled in the sex shop bead curtain that they have to put me down like a horse with a broken leg.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇨🇾 has bookmarked:

I have some cake and now I’m eating it too. Not seeing the problem here.

Someone from 🇪🇹 has bookmarked:

(guy who’s not even that into you) I love you.

Someone from 🇳🇱 has copied:

If you’re not easily offended, why are you even online?

Someone from 🇫🇮 has downloaded:

The lion doesn’t concern himself with credit card debt.

Someone from 🇧🇼 has shared:

I’ve done literally nothing all day, except feel guilty about doing nothing all day.

Someone from 🇬🇧 has downloaded:

I am so incredibly tired today. I think my shelf life has expired.

Someone from 🇯🇴 has downloaded:

I’m planning to eat the rich, but can I sub out fries for a salad?

Someone from 🇩🇰 has downloaded:

If you keep your AC any higher than 75, please don’t invite me to your terrarium, you lizard.

Someone from 🇦🇸 has shared:

Having a crush on someone is just having a lack of information on someone.

Someone from 🇸🇪 has shared:

Ugh, but profoundly.

Social Media Log 💫

Spreading quickly via Threads:

Sex in the snow is wintercourse.

Spotted on Reddit:

My toxic trait is destroying my room every time I get dressed.

Trending via WhatsApp:

I enjoy long walks up and down my stairs trying to remember what I was supposed to be doing.

Just shared via Telegram:

Super excited to not contribute anything worthwhile today.

Live now on Messenger:

I don’t like how monkeys have taken ownership of the whole banana thing. I bet I like bananas almost as much as they do.

Trending via Discord:

Statistically speaking, people don’t object enough at weddings.

Seen just now on Instagram:

Being able to notice that a celebrity unfollowed another celebrity is some seriously jobless behaviour.

Going viral on Snapchat:

I broke up with the gym. We were just not working out.

Spotted on Facebook:

Whoever said “Out of sight, out of mind” never had a spider disappear in their bedroom.

Shared recently on X:

Deodorant? No, I never need to buy any. People just give it to me. Complete strangers sometimes.

Wordgag 🎅

Activity Log ✨

I usually decompose after work rather than decompress.

Related Funny Posts 🤝

Has anybody else completely lost it or is it just me and Kanye?

I get shy when my man stares at me for too long because what if he’s realizing I’m actually a lil ugly.

Please don’t flirt with me. I’m trying not to cheat on my crush who doesn’t like me.

It was so hot today, I thought I was going to be cremated.

People that tell us what sex gods they are, what do you want us to do with that information?

Me: “I should treat myself to something.” My bank account: “Dream on.”

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨