Trendy Funny Quotes

  • Today sucked so bad, I had to stop by the liquor store on my way to the bar.
  • I keep my eyes in great shape by rolling them constantly.
  • Even in my early 20’s, I was diagnosed with late stage 40’s.
  • I hate when I go to the kitchen looking for food, and all I find is ingredients.
  • If a beer is 8 bucks, it’s a show. If a beer is 14 bucks, it’s a concert.
  • I often wonder how men could discover entire continents. Mine can’t even find the butter in the fridge.