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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇧🇭 has copied:

The concept of dominant hands is hilarious to me. That one of our hands is just like, “No, I’m not helping.”

Someone from 🇦🇱 has shared:

Staying in bed all day is my way of saving money.

Someone from 🇦🇸 has copied:

The web is the only place where you encourage strangers to follow you. What could possibly go wrong?

Someone from 🇨🇺 has viewed:

Where have you been all of my life and can you please go back there?

Someone from 🇵🇬 has copied:

If you want to complain about my driving at least calm down and get off my hood first.

Someone from 🇾🇪 has shared:

Waking up has backfired on me so many times.

Someone from 🇹🇲 has copied:

Cars should come with a secondary smaller “sorry” horn for when you do something a lil silly by accident.

Someone from 🇧🇫 has viewed:

Life is just a sequence of missed opportunities.

Someone from 🇧🇳 has shared:

The prettier you are, the weirder it gets.

Someone from 🇪🇸 has downloaded:

Imagine how much better the world would be if everyone set aside their differences and came together as one to buy me a castle.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

2243 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

12,405

Funny Quotes Topics

15,108

Funny Quotes Images

12,405

60 minutes ago

3,438

Social Media Log 💫

Trending via WhatsApp:

Life is short. Smile while you still have teeth.

Shared recently on Snapchat:

There are a few certainties in this life: death, taxes and when a Canadian tells you it’s cold out, it’s cold out.

Trending via LinkedIn:

According to a study, people believe anything that starts with ‘according to a study’.

Live now on WhatsApp:

The little umbrella is so unnecessary. Like, my drink is already wet, bro.

Live now on Discord:

Girls these days are like a box of chocolates. Some have nuts.

Just landed via Twitch:

You unfollow me because you are afraid of falling in love with me. I know!

Going viral on Discord:

If I found E.T., I would’ve developed his jump shot.

Trending via WhatsApp:

Twitter is evidence that insane people can be extremely entertaining from a safe distance.

Seen just now on Slack:

I’ve woken up yet again without an emotional support capybara.

Just shared via YouTube:

America’s national anthem should be changed to Welcome to the Jungle.

Making food: 1 hour. Eating food: 20 seconds. Washing dishes: never ending.

4 months ago

Making food: 1 hour. Eating food: 20 seconds. Washing dishes: never ending.

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Commentary:
"Ah, the eternal cycle of kitchen woes: slaving away for hours to create a masterpiece, only for it to disappear in mere seconds, leaving behind a mountain of dishes that seems to reproduce on its own. It's like a twisted game of culinary whack-a-mole – just when you think you've conquered the kitchen, the dishes pop up again, laughing in the face of your clean plate aspirations."

chore, cooking, dishes, eating, food, humor, kitchen, making, meal, struggle, time

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

New Funny Quotes

Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

Trending Topics 📁

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

2243 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

12,405

Funny Quotes Topics

15,108

Funny Quotes Images

12,405

60 minutes ago

3,453

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇹🇭 has downloaded:

The best time to start a family fight is now. It gets you out of buying relatives gifts.

Someone from 🇲🇨 has bookmarked:

I don’t carry my wallet to work because I’m afraid someone will steal it while I’m sleeping.

Someone from 🇱🇦 has viewed:

It’s a good thing when your therapist sits down with a bucket of popcorn, right?

Someone from 🇸🇾 has viewed:

Dogs are man’s best friend because a dog would never blindside you with a group chat.

Someone from 🇸🇷 has copied:

I’ve added lunges to my workout routine. It’s a big step forward.

Someone from 🇲🇪 has bookmarked:

Going to hack Kanye’s account and make him post something normal.

Someone from 🇴🇲 has shared:

If the universe is continuing to expand then why does my rent keep going up?

Someone from 🇨🇱 has bookmarked:

Carrying a baby for nine months and then naming it Chet is insane.

Someone from 🇯🇲 has shared:

We do it every night. Annoy each other.

Someone from 🇸🇻 has copied:

I’ve had so much tea trying to get rid of this cold that I’m now speaking with a British accent and am fascinated with the Royal family.

Social Media Log 💫

Broadcasted on Pinterest:

I try to contain my craziness, but the lid keeps popping off.

Spreading quickly via Slack:

Your 20s are for trying soup, making new soups, and discussing soup or soup related topics.

Going viral on WhatsApp:

If there’s one thing I’m good at, it’s being annoyed by stupidity.

Spreading quickly via Pinterest:

Technically I’m still young, but according to my back pain I’m actually 69.

Going viral on Twitch:

Life is a highway: Too many cars, not enough bathrooms.

Reported on YouTube:

Bob was hungry. He ripped open a new bag of tortillas only to discover a convenient, resealable opening on the other end.

Going viral on Threads:

I thought there was a spider on the rug but it was just yarn. It’s dead yarn now though.

Just shared via X:

Increasing the amount of high fives I give my boss each day until he quits his job.

Reported on Slack:

I need an app that deletes my number from other people’s phones.

Trending via Instagram:

The state of my house can best be described as “there seems to have been a struggle”.

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