Wordgag ツ

Commentary:
"Uh oh, seems like someone's not in the mood for a babysitter of the year award 🏆👶 Maybe it's time to bring out the big guns – the peekaboo strategy never fails! 😄"

baby, crying, humor, joke, maybe, parenting

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

The phrase “don’t take this the wrong way” has a 0% success rate.

0

2 months ago

advice, communication, humor, irony, misunderstanding, phrase, rate, success, success rate, take, wrong
My superpower is to make anyone I wanna make comfortable feel uncomfortable.

0

2 months ago

awkwardness, comfortable, feel, humor, i, irony, personality, skill, social, social skill, superpower, uncomfortable
So heartbreaking to do laundry and realize you can’t wash the clothes you’re literally wearing right now… you will never have a completely fresh start.

0

5 months ago

clothes, daily, daily life, fresh, fresh start, heartbreak, humor, laundry, life, literally, never, realize, right, start, wash, washing, wear
Shout out to people jogging in this heat, no, seriously, shout out to make sure they’re okay.

0

2 months ago

concern, exercise, heat, humor, jogging, okay, people, seriously, shout, shout out, sure
Phone is a cigarette for eyes.

0

4 months ago

addiction, cigarette, eye, eyes, eyesight, humor, metaphor, phone, screen, screen time, technology, time
Old people understand Roman numerals. I for one.

0

2 months ago

age, humor, i, irony, numeral, old, old people, people, roman, Roman numeral, understand, understanding, wit

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

64 shares on Snapchat this month:

Don’t interrupt me while I’m embarrassing myself.

37 shares on Discord this month:

You were there at the beginning of the Internet if you’ve heard the following: “Get off the web, I need to make a call!”

31 shares on X this month:

Superwoman: Single. Batman: Single. Wonder Woman: Single. I get it now, I’m single because I’m a superhero.

49 shares on Pinterest this month:

I think the bowl of ice cream I ate earlier gave me a stomach ache, so I ate a another bowl to make sure.

59 shares on Slack this month:

Runners who smoke need to pick a side.

76 shares on Discord this month:

I’m going to get some steel wool so I can crochet myself a new car.

50 shares on LinkedIn this month:

The cost of living has gotten so high, I’m thinking about having a nap for dinner.

27 shares on X this month:

A guy in the parking lot saw me trip over my own feet so I yelled to him “I just quantum leaped into this body!”

71 shares on X this month:

Unmarried in your 30s should honestly be rebranded as – ‘Congrats, you didn’t pick the wrong person out of panic’.

91 shares on LinkedIn this month:

Not to upset anyone, but Monday is waiting outside.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇸🇧 has viewed:

The rainforest cafe won’t be authentic enough for me if they don’t bulldoze 40% of the restaurant while I’m there.

Someone from 🇫🇮 has shared:

I don’t always whoop, but when I do, there it is.

Someone from 🇸🇮 has viewed:

Having sex with the same person gets freakier and nastier each time.

Someone from 🇦🇪 has downloaded:

January is the Monday of the year.

Someone from 🇲🇹 has copied:

Did you know that if you listen to any Black Sabbath album backwards, you can hear them singing backwards?

Someone from 🇭🇳 has shared:

I think being a hopeless romantic is giving me brain damage.

Someone from 🇨🇴 has bookmarked:

I am at my Thanksgiving table observing personality disorders that have not been identified yet.

Someone from 🇸🇰 has downloaded:

I don’t have gray hair, I have wisdom highlights.

Someone from 🇭🇹 has viewed:

I’m sorry to break it to you, but you need a soul to have a soulmate.

Someone from 🇧🇩 has viewed:

My family passed down mood swings and anxiety instead of money or houses.

Social Media Log 💫

Spotted on X:

Me to alien: I, too, try to live among people undetected.

Shared recently on TikTok:

Dating again after you break up with a long-term partner is like dying in a video game and ending up back at the start to do it all again, except with less health.

Going viral on Twitch:

Hot girls have a private Instagram account with 20 followers.

Shared recently on Instagram:

I keep pressing the space bar, but I’m still on Earth.

Trending via Instagram:

No one lies more than a parent who says, “We’ll see.” You know we’re not seeing anything.

Just landed via WhatsApp:

“Santa isn’t real!” Okay, I literally just saw him at the mall.

Going bananas on Facebook:

Shout out to the dude who flipped me off in traffic. Making me feel all nostalgic for California, thank you.

Just shared via X:

Aren’t you a little old to be a bully?

Spotted on Threads:

Every morning I regret why I didn’t sleep earlier the night before.

Live now on Reddit:

You can always tell it’s Monday because nobody’s smiling.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

Maybe your baby is crying because it doesn’t like you.

Related Funny Posts 🤝

The phrase “don’t take this the wrong way” has a 0% success rate.

My superpower is to make anyone I wanna make comfortable feel uncomfortable.

So heartbreaking to do laundry and realize you can’t wash the clothes you’re literally wearing right now… you will never have a completely fresh start.

Shout out to people jogging in this heat, no, seriously, shout out to make sure they’re okay.

Phone is a cigarette for eyes.

Old people understand Roman numerals. I for one.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨