Wordgag ツ

Commentary:
"Who needs a boring 401(k) when you've got a treasure map and a sense of adventure?! 🗺️💰 Retirement goals set to 'X marks the spot' level! ⛏️✨#PirateLife"

adventure, buried, buried treasure, contingency, financial, financial security, finding, humor, hunt, me, plan, point, retirement, retirement plan, security, thinking, treasure, treasure hunt, wealth, wishful, wishful thinking

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

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Social Media Stars ⭐

20 shares on Telegram this month:

A DM? Flirt on the timeline like a real man.

33 shares on Messenger this month:

I wish I could get a bouquet of mozzarella sticks.

65 shares on Telegram this month:

I wonder how many calories I can burn petting my cat.

87 shares on X this month:

The only thing Flat Earthers have to fear is sphere itself.

79 shares on Snapchat this month:

They say the human body is 60% water, but after extensive observation of my husband and son, I’d like to submit a revision to the data. Those two are at least 50% wind.

59 shares on X this month:

My teenager has really expensive taste for someone who can’t afford to buy their own toothpaste.

86 shares on X this month:

Life can only give you lemons if you answer the door.

80 shares on Discord this month:

You know you’re getting old when you’re entering your birth year online and you need to spin that thing like you’re on wheel of fortune.

30 shares on Instagram this month:

I am calling on public libraries to ban the books that I borrowed and lost. We don’t need that kind of crap in the libraries.

11 shares on Reddit this month:

The reason I don’t trust polls is because the people being polled are people who willingly answer the phone when an unknown number is calling them.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇲🇾 has downloaded:

If you’re riding in my car, that little middle piece is for my elbow — not yours.

Someone from 🇱🇮 has shared:

Drinking 3L of water daily helps you avoid other people’s drama because you’re too busy peeing. Stay hydrated.

Someone from 🇵🇦 has downloaded:

Not being able to teleport is continuing to be a huge inconvenience for me.

Someone from 🇳🇴 has copied:

I be skipping everyone’s stories but watch mine like 20 times.

Someone from 🇨🇫 has bookmarked:

Maybe I’ll quit so I can focus on summer.

Someone from 🇧🇳 has downloaded:

I think I may need professional help. A chef, a butler and a maid should do it!

Someone from 🇩🇰 has viewed:

If you are sad, just sing and you will realize that your voice is worse than your problem.

Someone from 🇰🇪 has bookmarked:

Sometimes I just stand in the sun and stare at nothing, like a dog.

Someone from 🇨🇦 has downloaded:

Not me out here checking the growth progress of my potted flowers only a couple hours after I planted the seeds in the first place.

Someone from 🇪🇨 has copied:

Once you realize that no one really cares how you’re doing, it becomes much easier to answer the question.

Social Media Log 💫

Freshly posted on Messenger:

Source??? Pattern recognition.

Trending via WhatsApp:

My laundry is done, but I don’t even want it anymore. The washing machine can keep it.

Shared recently on Facebook:

I’ve finally found out what chronology is. And it’s about time.

Just landed via WhatsApp:

I remixed a remix, it was back to normal.

Going viral on Telegram:

The best part of Thanksgiving is being with family and friends, and a vast array of pies.

Making waves on YouTube:

The only things that are really cool in my company are my salary and me.

Going viral on Pinterest:

I could never abuse substances, they mean a lot to me.

Going viral on X:

I hope your spoon slides into your soup.

Freshly posted on Instagram:

I’m not drunk enough for this Teams meeting.

Going viral on WeChat:

When I’m in a good mood, I go to my blocked list and release one or two prisoners.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

My retirement plan is 100% contingent on me finding a buried treasure at some point.

It took three employees to help me complete “self-checkout” yesterday.

People say, “Listen to your heart, do the right thing,” like they are the same things.

Women know the exact weight of their children and their age in days. Men just know that little people live with them.

I can understand why chickens wake up and scream.

I hate when the iPhone corrects ‘Omw’ to ‘On my way!’. Man, I am not that excited.

You know IT have given up when the error message reads, ‘Something went wrong’.

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Activity Log ✨

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

My retirement plan is 100% contingent on me finding a buried treasure at some point.

Keep the laugh going 😂

It took three employees to help me complete “self-checkout” yesterday.

People say, “Listen to your heart, do the right thing,” like they are the same things.

Women know the exact weight of their children and their age in days. Men just know that little people live with them.

I can understand why chickens wake up and scream.

I hate when the iPhone corrects ‘Omw’ to ‘On my way!’. Man, I am not that excited.

You know IT have given up when the error message reads, ‘Something went wrong’.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨