Trendy Funny Quotes

  • I’ve done the math: If the month had 10 days, I would get by with my money.
  • Today I bought a doughnut without sprinkles. This diet thing is hard.
  • Headed to a wedding but my wife said I’m not allowed to refer to the bride as ‘the veiled threat.’
  • Lego bricks are classic educational toys. You step on them once and you can do ballet.
  • Why isn’t there a mosquito that sucks fat?
  • Diarrhea. Having it. Spelling it. Everything about it is shit.