33 funny finding quotes - Wordgag

Crying at my desk while also finding time to cry in the shower makes for a healthy work-life balance.

May 24, 2026

My dad thought Siri would be more helpful finding a lemon ricotta recipe if he used an Italian accent.

May 23, 2026

The biggest problem with finding another job is I don’t want one.

May 23, 2026

Nothing is worse than seeing a gorgeous girl that I’d never approach or stand a chance with and then finding out she has a boyfriend.

May 22, 2026

Despite popular opinion, dating apps are NOT for dating. They are for finding people to watch your Instagram story for years and years.

May 22, 2026

Nothing like waking up on a Friday and finding out it’s Tuesday.

May 22, 2026

I’ve just found my wide pants again. They weren’t gone at all, they’re just my tight pants now.

May 21, 2026

The worst thing is finding out the “sweet guy” is just a lustful loser.

May 21, 2026

I would love to go back to the days when the biggest stress was finding the best hiding place when playing hide and seek.

May 21, 2026

Can’t sleep because I keep finding exciting opportunities to get pissed off.

May 21, 2026

If you’re having trouble finding the match to one of your socks, throw it away and the missing one will immediately show up. Follow me for more life hacks.

May 21, 2026

My retirement plan is 100% contingent on me finding a buried treasure at some point.

May 20, 2026

There is absolutely no excuse for laziness. But if you find one, let me know.

May 20, 2026

If you find me offensive, then I suggest you quit finding me.

May 19, 2026

That period between finding out you got a new job and actually starting the new job is one of the best times in life.

May 19, 2026

The good news is that I’ve been finding new ways to waste my time.

May 19, 2026

The morning routine that takes the longest: finding the will to live.

May 18, 2026

The hard part about dating is finding someone who’s mentally ill enough to understand you, but not mentally ill enough to ruin your life.

May 18, 2026

Once I matched with a guy and ended up finding out he lived in my neighborhood, so I told him to go outside and scream, and he did. And I heard it.

May 18, 2026

I’ve learned the best way to find something that I’ve lost is to buy a replacement one, to make the lost one spontaneously appear.

Apr 1, 2026

“I’m basically the human version of finding $20 in old jeans.”

Apr 1, 2026

The only Spanish I know is buenas noches, which means bonus nachos – like finding forgotten tortilla chips in your cargo shorts.

Mar 31, 2026

Getting an extra 20 minutes in the day when someone cancels a meeting is like finding a penny on the ground. Not gonna use it for anything, but wow, am I excited.

Mar 31, 2026

Being a millennial means finding out you can’t afford to live in that apartment complex you thought was really shady when you were a kid.

Mar 31, 2026

I speak for everyone when I say that finding the balance between watching movies, watching TV shows, and playing video games is harder than any job.

Mar 31, 2026

Striking gold in your 40s: finding a close parking spot that’s in the shade on a hot summer day.

Mar 30, 2026

Finding a person to make eye contact with during stupid meetings is essential to survival in the workplace.

Mar 29, 2026

I wish Amazon would stop finding things I might like.

Mar 28, 2026

Spiders are the only web developers who love finding bugs.

Mar 27, 2026

It’s crazy that we’re closer to the year 3000 then I am to finding love.

Mar 27, 2026

It’s normal that my retirement plan is 100% contingent on me finding buried treasure at some point, right?

Mar 27, 2026

Imagine falling in love and then finding out that they put antlers on their car for the holidays.

Mar 27, 2026

Imagine falling in love with me then finding out I’m a slow walker.

Mar 27, 2026