Trendy Funny Quotes

  • I intend to live forever. So far, so good.
  • What a bleak life it must be if you’ve never had a drink shoot through your nose when you laugh.
  • Currently helping my kids find the chocolate that I ate last night.
  • Had chicken and egg for dinner because I wanted to eat the whole family.
  • Just saw someone my age running and she wasn’t chasing an ice-cream truck.
  • Sorry, Mom, I can’t go outside, I’m ugly.