Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇲🇬 has viewed:

Sorry I was late, I was frantically applying to other jobs.

Someone from 🇺🇿 has viewed:

You know what part I love about waking up? None of it. Let me sleep!

Someone from 🇲🇨 has shared:

Whoever said having a crush is when you feel the most like Carrie Bradshaw was so real for that.

Someone from 🇨🇱 has downloaded:

The worst part of marriage is when you do something stupid, the best part of marriage is when your partner does something stupid.

Someone from 🇨🇾 has shared:

If you give a man a fish, that fish is basically gone. Way to lose your fish.

Someone from 🇬🇲 has viewed:

Everyone’s gangster until they need to pee.

Someone from 🇱🇦 has viewed:

I really appreciate where you’re coming from. I just wish you’d go back.

Someone from 🇧🇧 has copied:

There should be a calorie refund for food that didn’t taste as good as you expected.

Someone from 🇸🇰 has copied:

My house was clean yesterday. Sorry, you missed it.

Someone from 🇬🇾 has downloaded:

If we start dating now, we could be feeding each other deviled eggs on Thanksgiving, and breaking up before we have to exchange gifts for Christmas.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

817 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,979

Funny Quotes Topics

13,919

Funny Quotes Images

10,979

55 minutes ago

3,427

Social Media Log 💫

Spreading quickly via X:

Wiping my hands on my pants before I’m shaking someone’s hand, so they spend the rest of the day wondering what I just touched.

Going viral on Messenger:

What was the name of the boat in Titanic?

Making waves on WeChat:

“Are you single?” No, I’m in a hallucinationship.

Just landed via WeChat:

I wanna meet the person whose parents are super disappointed he went to medical school instead of becoming a stand-up comedian.

Live now on Instagram:

Grocery shopping while hungry feels like online shopping while drunk.

Freshly posted on Instagram:

They should invent more hobbies for people without skills or patience.

Breaking via Facebook:

I always make sure the garage door is shut. Wouldn’t want hoodlums stealing the stuff I’ve been meaning to get rid of for years.

Freshly posted on Discord:

My lawyer dropped his briefcase and nunchuks fell out.

Just landed via X:

Hell hath no fury like a sports bra being applied to a just showered but not 100% dry body.

Just shared via Reddit:

The word “ugly” cannot be used on women, I’m sorry. Women just can’t be ugly, that’s a boy thing.

One minute you’re young and fun and the next, you need a tow out of a beanbag chair.

6 months ago

One minute you’re young and fun and the next, you need a tow out of a beanbag chair.

Download image ↓

Commentary:
"Life comes at you fast – one minute you're the life of the party 🎉, the next you're stuck in a beanbag chair contemplating your life choices 🤔. Remember, age is just a number, but beanbag chair entrapment is a serious hazard! 😂 #AdultingProblems"

aging, beanbag, chair, changes, fun, humor, life, life changes, minute, need, next, tow, young

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

New Funny Quotes

Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

Trending Topics 📁

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

817 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,979

Funny Quotes Topics

13,919

Funny Quotes Images

10,979

55 minutes ago

3,424

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇨🇺 has downloaded:

Not all who wander are lost. Some are just moms. In Target. Hiding from their children.

Someone from 🇪🇨 has downloaded:

Sorry, I don’t think I can hang out this weekend, my 4-year-old is still telling a joke.

Someone from 🇧🇬 has downloaded:

Why would I take the high road when I could take the psychopath?

Someone from 🇫🇮 has viewed:

My favorite things about Twitter are that everything you read is true, everyone is nice, and all intentions are pure of heart.

Someone from 🇮🇷 has viewed:

Go outside and let the rain do what your boyfriend can’t.

Someone from 🇺🇸 has viewed:

If she says “so just what exactly is THAT supposed to mean”, you’re gonna have a bad time.

Someone from 🇲🇷 has copied:

After I drink coffee, I show my empty cup to the IT guy and say that I have successfully installed Java. He hates me.

Someone from 🇯🇲 has viewed:

Not to brag but I don’t even need alcohol to make really bad decisions.

Someone from 🇸🇩 has downloaded:

Forget Spotify Wrapped. I’m more interested in seeing your Pornhub Wrapped.

Someone from 🇱🇮 has shared:

My favorite part of leaving the house is looking forward to going home.

Social Media Log 💫

Shared recently on Instagram:

On the internet it’s super easy to take credit for stuff you had nothing to do with. That’s why I invented it.

Just landed via Discord:

Y’all can keep the nonchalant ones — I want mine weak in the knees about me.

Shared recently on Pinterest:

I’m not saying it’s been a while, I’m just saying I completely blanked on the name of my gym.

Spotted on LinkedIn:

There should be a withering shamrock emoji so that people can express misfortune or Irish grief.

Seen just now on Pinterest:

Saving up ketchup packets in the fridge so I can one day open my own restaurant.

Shared recently on Reddit:

Everything is dishwasher safe if you don’t care enough about it.

Live now on Reddit:

I can’t really explain it but cereal at night tastes better than cereal in the morning.

Spreading quickly via Messenger:

I have my own hand stamper at home so my coworkers will think I went someplace fun the night before.

Going viral on Reddit:

Edging my house plants by putting them next to the window when it rains.

Spotted on Snapchat:

Most people think that T-Rexes can’t clap because they have short arms, but really it’s because they’re dead.

Share Wordgag 🙏

© 2025. All fights retarded. 🤪

Made with ❤️ in Sydney ☀️🌴