Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇺🇸 has viewed:

I would never put up a lost dog poster. I’m not letting the whole neighborhood know I fumbled.

Someone from 🇧🇴 has viewed:

Relationship status: nobody is cheating on me so that’s pretty neat.

Someone from 🇧🇦 has bookmarked:

Me, literally climbing out of a dumpster: Can I give you some personal advice?

Someone from 🇳🇮 has downloaded:

If you know karate, you shouldn’t have to pay for stuff.

Someone from 🇸🇪 has bookmarked:

Caught my husband staring at me again. He’s probably weighing his pros and cons.

Someone from 🇧🇴 has copied:

I’m sorry I don’t take orders. I barely take suggestions.

Someone from 🇯🇲 has downloaded:

Gravestone inscription: “Hey guys, I’m going to be taking a little break from social media”

Someone from 🇯🇲 has bookmarked:

Your favorite little ball of silliness has logged in.

Someone from 🇫🇲 has bookmarked:

Airport beer at 6 a.m.? No problem. The airport is a lawless place that is free from judgment.

Someone from 🇳🇵 has viewed:

lol is punctuation and LOL is laugh out loud.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

2385 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

12,547

Funny Quotes Topics

15,226

Funny Quotes Images

12,547

Updated

38 minutes ago

Users Online

3,453

Social Media Log 💫

Seen just now on Slack:

Weekends are getting shorter and shorter. You blink and it’s already Sunday 5pm.

Just shared via Instagram:

If I complain about being out of shape, I don’t actually want fitness tips and workouts to try. I just want to complain and remain out of shape. What is wrong with you people?

Breaking via Pinterest:

Inside every older person is a younger person wondering what the hell happened.

Broadcasted on WhatsApp:

The most avoided species of shark is the Loan.

Just landed via LinkedIn:

When my sister drives, I am NOT passenger princess, I am a survivor.

Just landed via TikTok:

80% of arguments start because someone hasn’t eaten yet.

Going viral on WhatsApp:

The difference between the Olympic village and a normal village is that not everyone in the Olympic village is related to each other.

Just shared via Twitch:

I made you something special for Mother’s Day, my kid threatened.

Trending via Instagram:

You’re not depressed. You just need $250,000 in your bank account.

Spotted on WeChat:

I need to stop saying “Oppa Gagnam Style!” to fill in awkward pauses in conversation.

People say opposites attract, but I say find a partner who’s deranged in the same ways you are and double your capacity to be annoying.

People say opposites attract, but I say find a partner who’s deranged in the same ways you are and double your capacity to be annoying.
Download image ↓

Commentary:
"Who needs opposites when you can find someone to be double the chaos with? 🤪🤪 It’s like having a partner in crime, except the crime is being overwhelmingly annoying together! 😜👯‍♂️ #DoubleTrouble #CrazyLove"

, , , , , , , , , , , , ,

Related Funny Quotes 🤝

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

New Funny Quotes
Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

2385 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

12,547

Funny Quotes Topics

15,226

Funny Quotes Images

12,547

Updated

38 minutes ago

Users Online

3,447

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇲🇳 has bookmarked:

Why can’t people be tested like watermelons? You tap them on the head and find out whether they are normal or bad.

Someone from 🇧🇪 has copied:

If you ask him what he admires most about a woman and he says brains, you’ve got yourself a zombie.

Someone from 🇩🇰 has downloaded:

Walking that line between “The internet is great” and “The internet is a mistake” daily.

Someone from 🇧🇩 has copied:

Grocery shopping while hungry feels like online shopping while drunk.

Someone from 🇳🇵 has downloaded:

Now I know why my dad used to wake up at 4AM and just sit at the kitchen table for an hour.

Someone from 🇪🇷 has downloaded:

I’m so bored, I’m gonna join a poly-relationship and stage a coup and kick the main one out.

Someone from 🇮🇸 has bookmarked:

Tattoos: because being an adult is hard, and I deserve to have stickers.

Someone from 🇵🇪 has shared:

The feminine urge to open a coffee shop that’s also a library, a bakery, and a flower shop.

Someone from 🇲🇻 has downloaded:

Apologies for the delays. The suitcase smashing machine has broken down, so we’re having to smash suitcases by hand.

Someone from 🇪🇸 has shared:

If a woman says “Do what you want!”, then for God’s sake don’t do what you want!

Social Media Log 💫

Breaking via Reddit:

Today’s the day I’m gonna’ make the onions cry.

Live now on Instagram:

My body is a “wonder what happened” land.

Going viral on YouTube:

I switched from coffee to orange juice and told my doctor I felt better. He said it’s the vitamin C and natural sugars, but I think it’s the vodka.

Shared recently on WhatsApp:

If you don’t want to be in love with me that’s fine. You’re entitled to your wrong and very stupid opinions.

Just landed via X:

I love having plans to cancel.

Spotted on Instagram:

Apologies about the delay to your flight. We’re just waiting for one 3D printed part, but apparently a ‘fuselage’ takes a little time.

Shared recently on Reddit:

Do you think they’re called cough drops because when you cough really hard they drop out of your mouth onto the floor?

Seen just now on X:

Kids be like: “Nice bathroom mirror. It would be a shame if I spat toothpaste all over it.”

Spotted on Instagram:

Ruin a perfectly nice trip out with your child by bringing your child.

Trending via Slack:

To me, essential oils are what drips out of tacos.

Share Wordgag 🙏

© 2025. All rights reserved.

Made with ❤️ in Sydney ☀️🌴