Wordgag ツ

Commentary:
Looks like Santa's got some spelling and grammar policing to do this year! Remember, folks, even Santa needs some help deciphering those questionable Facebook posts. It's all fun and games until your present is a thesaurus!

Christmas, dictionary, Facebook, getting, gift, humor, post, Santa, witty, year

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

I was actually a little too thankful yesterday so today I’m going to even it out with some ungratefulness and entitlement.

0

2 months ago

actually, attitude, balance, entitlement, even, going, humor, i, irony, little, thankfulness, today, too, ungratefulness, yesterday
My teen is asking for noise-cancelling headphones like I’m going to give him the gift of ignoring me better.

0

2 months ago

asking, better, gift, give, going, headphone, headphones, humor, ignoring, me, noise-cancelling, noise-cancelling headphone, parenting, sarcasm, teen
Babies first steal your glasses and then bite your nose. I don’t know where they get their reputation.

0

2 months ago

baby, bite, glasses, humor, i, know, nose, parenting, reputation, where
Our dog snores so loud, we had to rename him Grandpa.

0

2 months ago

dog, family, grandpa, humor, joke, loud, nickname, pet, snore
“Are you sexually active?” Dude, I’m not even socially active.

0

2 months ago

active, activity, awkwardness, dude, even, humor, life, relationship, sexual, sexual activity, social, social activity, social life, socially
Men be like, “I want you.” Yeah, to suffer.

0

2 months ago

desire, humor, i, men, relationships, sarcasm, suffer, suffering, want

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

24 shares on YouTube this month:

Downloading the Titanic soundtrack. It’s syncing right now.

29 shares on Slack this month:

Even worse than the buzzing of the mosquitoes is the moment when it suddenly stops.

22 shares on Facebook this month:

There’s something so romantic about getting McDonald’s with a lover. Intimate perhaps.

24 shares on Facebook this month:

If I’m wrongly accused of a crime, I’m going to prison. I’m way too introverted to have an alibi.

27 shares on Snapchat this month:

I don’t normally like to brag about expensive trips but I just got back from the grocery store.

77 shares on Reddit this month:

God: “I genuinely don’t remember making you all this stupid.”

29 shares on Reddit this month:

If they stole your post, they probably need it more than you do.

32 shares on Instagram this month:

Normalise following up to an ignored email with “helllooooooo?”

56 shares on Slack this month:

Sorry I’m late, my song came on at the grocery store.

84 shares on Reddit this month:

Help, I accidentally used dark humor with normal people, and now they’re concerned for my mental health.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇳🇪 has viewed:

People believe that they have brains but maybe that’s just inside their heads.

Someone from 🇰🇷 has viewed:

Taking a dog named shark to the beach is a bad idea.

Someone from 🇳🇿 has viewed:

I’m not gaining weight, I’m retaining candy.

Someone from 🇬🇳 has copied:

I miss my kids the most when they go to bed and the mosquitoes go after me because they have no other options.

Someone from 🇹🇼 has shared:

Lorebombing is when you make a new friend in your thirties and you have to catch each other up.

Someone from 🇩🇯 has downloaded:

Damn, how much daylight are they trying to save? It’s dark as hell.

Someone from 🇦🇬 has shared:

I was not meant to work a job; I was meant to lay down and ponder.

Someone from 🇬🇳 has shared:

Dearest, I beg of you, sleep properly and go for walks.

Someone from 🇲🇦 has bookmarked:

Breakfast in bed: where your cozy blanket turns into a crumby crime scene.

Someone from 🇾🇪 has shared:

I was having a great time until I remembered that I was ugly.

Social Media Log 💫

Going viral on Pinterest:

If you accuse me of yelling, you will start to hear yelling so you can note the difference in the future.

Just landed via Twitch:

Please go out, have fun, have friends, make connections. That mysterious lifestyle won’t save you.

Breaking via Instagram:

If a man says “I don’t deserve you,” believe him. Because he is about to show you why.

Spotted on YouTube:

“It’s bikini season,” I whisper, eating another bikini.

Shared recently on X:

Kind of miraculous how much love can be summoned and how much your day can be improved by just looking at an animal and saying stuff in a weird voice.

Spotted on Reddit:

I think my wife has got early Alzheimer’s. Every day she tells me that she has no idea what she first saw in me.

Trending via Messenger:

Happiness is when you really have nothing to do with people you want absolutely nothing to do with.

Freshly posted on Threads:

Why is incognito mode always associated with freaky shit? I use it to search up very obvious questions, so there’s no record of me looking dumb.

Live now on Twitch:

You know what I never see anymore are those old alcoholics with the weird noses.

Spotted on Slack:

After a quick review of my finances, everyone is going to have to be happy with a forehead kiss for Christmas.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

Santa saw your Facebook posts. This year you’re getting a dictionary.

Related Funny Quotes 🤝

I was actually a little too thankful yesterday so today I’m going to even it out with some ungratefulness and entitlement.

My teen is asking for noise-cancelling headphones like I’m going to give him the gift of ignoring me better.

Babies first steal your glasses and then bite your nose. I don’t know where they get their reputation.

Our dog snores so loud, we had to rename him Grandpa.

“Are you sexually active?” Dude, I’m not even socially active.

Men be like, “I want you.” Yeah, to suffer.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨