HASTINGS—In a groundbreaking zoological study, researchers at the University of Hastings suggest that women’s memory capabilities may rival that of elephants, especially in the area of insult retention. “It’s fascinating,” said Dr. Clara Tusk, memory specialist, “A woman can remember a single negative comment for decades, much like elephants who can recall painful events across vast migratory patterns.”
The study, which involved comparing recall rates between elephants and human females who were called unattractive once in their lives, found nearly identical retention rates. “We had women recalling an insult from 20 years ago as clearly as an elephant recalling a particularly prickly thorn bush threat,” explained Tusk, adding that this could redefine how memory is understood in mammals.
This finding has left many men reconsidering their conversations. Local husband Jim Swanson noted, “I told my wife she couldn’t parallel park once. That was in 1998. She reminded me just this morning, right after recalling our first date menu,” highlighting that both elephants and women may excel in cataloging both trivial facts and grudges with exceptional precision.