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Commentary:
Ah, a culinary clash between chaos and calamity! 🍳🔥🍔 Embrace your inner chef of chaos and whip up a delectable disaster with a side of destruction! Bon appétit, my daring culinary comrades! 🌋🔪

appetite, conflict, destruction, disaster, food, humor, irony, me, recipe, relationship

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

The IRS needs special envelopes for when you’re not in trouble.

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2 months ago

comedy, envelopes, finance, humor, IRS, needs, paperwork, special, ta, trouble
Accidentally falling asleep is always the best sleep — and that’s so irritating.

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2 months ago

accidental, accidental sleep, accidentally, always, asleep, best, falling, frustration, humor, humorous, irony, irritation, nap, sleep
If anyone wants a more cost effective energy provider, I can supply endless energy on tap from my absolutely not tired child at bedtime.

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2 months ago

bedtime, child, cost, cost effective, effective, endless, endless energy, energy, humor, i, parenting, supply, tired
“It’s been a long week!” Me, on a Tuesday.

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2 months ago

exhaustion, humor, long week, me, relatable, sarcasm, Tuesday, week, weekday
Nobody seems more shocked, disappointed and dismayed than the person behind the post office counter when I arrive and say I’ve got something to post.

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2 months ago

counter, disappointed, dismayed, i, nobody, office, person, post, post office, say, shocked, something
Ever think vampires just lied about hating garlic, now we’re just out here seasoning ourselves for them?

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2 months ago

cooking, ever, food, garlic, here, humor, irony, joke, just, lie, myth, seasoning, think, vampire

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

31 shares on Reddit this month:

Working on my harmonica skills so those around me can both hear and feel my depression.

78 shares on Snapchat this month:

If life has taught me one thing, it’s that I need more money.

31 shares on Instagram this month:

Is Craigslist still around, or did everyone over there get murdered?

63 shares on Messenger this month:

Don’t ruin a good sundress by wearing panties.

30 shares on WhatsApp this month:

Just pulled a Werther’s Original out of my pocket, like I’m 87 years old.

73 shares on Telegram this month:

I hate that I’m so indecisive. Actually, I don’t know if hate is the right word.

18 shares on Pinterest this month:

I no longer dislike Mondays, I’m mature now… I dislike the whole week.

49 shares on YouTube this month:

I’m attracted to people that no one pays attention to.

74 shares on Discord this month:

I treat people the way I want to be treated by not leaving the house.

54 shares on Telegram this month:

Foreplay is great, I particularly like the part where I peel them, chop them into pieces, then roast them in the oven until they’re all crispy and delicious.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇿🇼 has bookmarked:

The economy’s so tough, people out here eating grass — matcha.

Someone from 🇱🇦 has downloaded:

Roadtripping with my family has taught me that my marriage can withstand anything except roadtripping with my family.

Someone from 🇳🇿 has bookmarked:

I drink my coffee black because I like to save my calories for alcohol.

Someone from 🇧🇪 has shared:

Please stop calling 911 when you see me dancing. I’m fine!

Someone from 🇧🇧 has viewed:

Toddlers will take your last nerve, deep fry it and eat it for breakfast.

Someone from 🇩🇴 has viewed:

When I was a kid, I never expected the future to suck this much.

Someone from 🇦🇪 has viewed:

I survived a Monday, and for what? Tuesday? Disgusting.

Someone from 🇹🇼 has bookmarked:

There is a house I drive by most days and I can never tell if they are having a yard sale or that is just how they live.

Someone from 🇧🇹 has downloaded:

Oh great, you brought your ancient ancestors with you.

Someone from 🇳🇦 has shared:

Don’t be fooled by what your kids will eat at someone else’s house.

Social Media Log 💫

Just shared via Reddit:

Every morning I wake up and think I have a hangover, but then I realize I didn’t drink, and this is just how I feel now.

Making waves on Threads:

Life’s all about crossroads and intersections; unfortunately, I’m a bad driver.

Going viral on Snapchat:

Helvetica is my favorite font that sounds like a heavy metal band.

Shared recently on Reddit:

Being a millennial means finding out you can’t afford to live in that apartment complex you thought was really shady when you were a kid.

Trending via Discord:

I used to be a banker, but then I lost interest.

Just landed via LinkedIn:

Yogurts should come in a five-pack, not a four-pack, or make the workweek four days.

Trending via Snapchat:

About four minutes into my run, I’ve decided I want to work on my personality instead.

Just shared via Snapchat:

The worst thing about being an adult is that you have to be one every single day.

Live now on TikTok:

Doing nothing is very hard to do. You never know when you’re finished.

Freshly posted on Snapchat:

A car window made specifically for a dog to stick its head out of is called a sunwoof.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

The Recipe for Disaster in me, recognizes the Appetite for Destruction in you.

Related Funny Quotes 🤝

The IRS needs special envelopes for when you’re not in trouble.

Accidentally falling asleep is always the best sleep — and that’s so irritating.

If anyone wants a more cost effective energy provider, I can supply endless energy on tap from my absolutely not tired child at bedtime.

“It’s been a long week!” Me, on a Tuesday.

Nobody seems more shocked, disappointed and dismayed than the person behind the post office counter when I arrive and say I’ve got something to post.

Ever think vampires just lied about hating garlic, now we’re just out here seasoning ourselves for them?

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨