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Commentary:
"If the aroma of grilled goodness tickles your senses, consider yourself an official member of the cookout crew! 🍔🌭🥩 Time to follow your nose and join the feast 🎉🔥 #CookoutInvitation"

cookout, event, food, fun, gathering, invitation, outdoor, rule, smell, social, social event

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

I hate when I go to the kitchen looking for food, and all I find is ingredients.

2 months ago

cooking, craving, disappointment, food, hate, hunger, ingredient, kitchen, snack
My apologies to the Goodreads reviewer who found my novel about vampires on a submarine, “unrealistic.”

3 months ago

apology, found, Goodreads, humor, novel, reviewer, submarine, unrealistic, vampire, vampires
The tragedy of my life is that I theoretically know when I shouldn’t say anything. And then I hear myself talking.

2 months ago

hear, humor, i, know, life, myself, say, silence, talking, theoretically, tragedy
Due to personal reasons, I’ll be turning you into a poem.

2 months ago

creativity, due, humor, personal, personal reasons, poem, reasons, transformation, turning, writing
The only love triangle I’m interested in is between me, my book, and my cozy blanket.

1 hour ago

blanket, book, comfort, cozy, humor, interested, love, love triangle, me, only, reading, relaxation, self, self-love, triangle
I stopped adding “Let me know if you have any more questions!” to my emails because don’t email me again.

4 months ago

again, communication, email, email etiquette, emails, etiquette, humor, i, know, let, life, me, office, office life, questions, sarcasm, stopped, work, work email

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

91 shares on Threads this month:

No matter how early you get up, fate always gets up half an hour earlier.

23 shares on Pinterest this month:

I won $6 on a scratch-off last night. Out of my way, peasants!

37 shares on Pinterest this month:

Just walked by an empath and his head exploded.

98 shares on Discord this month:

I love how we didn’t raise the minimum wage because it would make food more expensive, but then just made the food more expensive anyway.

74 shares on Instagram this month:

I was just viciously body shamed by my mirror.

87 shares on LinkedIn this month:

The world would be a much nicer place if we just turn off the news.

40 shares on Facebook this month:

Starting a new show sucks. Who are these people?

88 shares on TikTok this month:

To avoid burnout at work, use the 30-30 rule: after 30 minutes of work, quit your job and disappear into the mountains for 30 years.

99 shares on Slack this month:

Mocktails are awesome because they ask the question ‘how much could juice cost?’

97 shares on Facebook this month:

Wonder if I should do something with my life, or kind of just continue to hang out.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇳🇪 has copied:

Cutting my steak at Texas Roadhouse with my car keys.

Someone from 🇸🇲 has viewed:

Apologies for the delays. The suitcase smashing machine has broken down, so we’re having to smash suitcases by hand.

Someone from 🇬🇧 has copied:

They say “Time heals.” No, it doesn’t. I’m still mad.

Someone from 🇹🇱 has bookmarked:

My new phone is being delivered by Amazon, which means that I can track its movements for a day before it tracks mine for five years.

Someone from 🇨🇺 has copied:

Your Honor, that doesn’t sound like me.

Someone from 🇱🇺 has copied:

I wish it were social acceptable to say “I don’t care” and walk away mid conversation when you’re bored.

Someone from 🇸🇳 has bookmarked:

I’d tell you to go to hell, but I work there and I don’t want to see you every day.

Someone from 🇦🇷 has downloaded:

We should be able to go to the bar and drink to watch Love Island, like men do with sports.

Someone from 🇹🇴 has downloaded:

You gotta act cool, calm, and collected around liquid eyeliner because it can sense your fear.

Someone from 🇱🇾 has copied:

Many years ago, I stood up to 100-200 million others only to sit in meetings now.

Social Media Log 💫

Just shared via Pinterest:

I get sad when I see how old people my age are.

Freshly posted on WhatsApp:

Sorry for texting you back instantly. My phone was in my hand, and I’m mature and actually like you.

Freshly posted on Slack:

I would go out more if there weren’t any humans out there.

Shared recently on LinkedIn:

Most people think that T-Rexes can’t clap because they have short arms, but really it’s because they are dead.

Live now on Pinterest:

How quickly family vacations go from “Omg, we only have 4 days left” to “Omg, we still have 4 days left”

Trending via Telegram:

Some people identify as funnier than they actually are.

Just shared via LinkedIn:

Apart from “It’s okay”, what other death threats do women use?

Shared recently on X:

Be the reason someone spits out their drink today.

Making waves on Instagram:

Being excited to get in bed is a different level of adulting.

Live now on Slack:

Why are these idiots only giving robots two arms?

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

The rule should be: if you can smell the cookout, you’re invited to the cookout.

Related Funny Posts 🤝

I hate when I go to the kitchen looking for food, and all I find is ingredients.

My apologies to the Goodreads reviewer who found my novel about vampires on a submarine, “unrealistic.”

The tragedy of my life is that I theoretically know when I shouldn’t say anything. And then I hear myself talking.

Due to personal reasons, I’ll be turning you into a poem.

The only love triangle I’m interested in is between me, my book, and my cozy blanket.

I stopped adding “Let me know if you have any more questions!” to my emails because don’t email me again.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨