Trending Funny Quotes 👇

  • “You shouldn’t let your cat jump on the counter”, my cat could take out a loan in my name if he wanted to.
  • My goal in life is to not have to commit seppuku.
  • When my husband says he’ll just be a minute, I know I have enough time to watch an entire television series, paint the house, or go on a quest.
  • Tip on how best to start a conversation with me: Not at all.
  • A fun thing to do on a first date is wear a wedding dress.
  • Tonight, my poor liver has to pay again for what went wrong during the week.