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Commentary:
"Self-checkout cameras: turning everyday shopping trips into dramatic episodes of our own lives since forever! 💸📸😱 #SelfieScare #DramaticShopping"

awareness, better, camera, ever, funny moment, humor, i, moment, reflection, self-checkout, shopping, think, yourself

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

Only at 27 do you become old, and then when you turn 30, you become younger than ever. That’s just how it goes.

3 months ago

27, 30, age, aging, birthday, ever, humor, just, life, old, only, turn, younger, youth
Thank God they have medical marijuana in this state. I need it for my joints.

4 months ago

God, gratitude, humor, i, joint, joints, law, marijuana, medical, medical marijuana, need, pain, pain relief, relief, state, state law, thanks
My dream DUI is driving a Saab through the Great British Bake Off tent.

2 months ago

bake, baking, British, comedy, dream, driving, DUI, food, great, Great British Bake Off, humor, Saab, tent
Pinterest recipe so long that it’s now a limited series on Netflix.

2 months ago

cooking, entertainment, expectations, food, humor, length, limited, limited sery, Netflix, Pinterest, recipe, series, sery
The secret to a clean home? Never let your husband or children in.

2 months ago

children, cleaning, home, husband, kids
I’m actually really good looking if you don’t look at me.

2 months ago

appearance, good, good looking, humor, irony, looking, me, self-deprecation

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

53 shares on LinkedIn this month:

The only time your man will surprise you is when you specifically tell him what you want.

28 shares on Slack this month:

My longest relationship has been with my Hotmail account.

79 shares on YouTube this month:

Dads will insist the Masters is exciting while also napping through it.

80 shares on LinkedIn this month:

When I die and y’all go through my search history, you’ll be disappointed to find mostly just definitions for very common words that I wasn’t sure I was using correctly.

70 shares on Threads this month:

I have never seen a sad person sliding down a water slide.

11 shares on WeChat this month:

My anti-theft device in my car is that it’s manual.

29 shares on WhatsApp this month:

Over Christmas, some bastard has snuck into my house, gone into my wardrobe, stolen my work trousers, and replaced them with a smaller pair.

55 shares on TikTok this month:

When I like a woman, I start to gather gifts for her like a squirrel hoarding nuts.

61 shares on Pinterest this month:

People that tell us what sex gods they are, what do you want us to do with that information?

14 shares on WeChat this month:

The older I get, the more I understand why roosters just scream to start their day.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇱🇰 has bookmarked:

Dear women, when you’re not around we load the dishwasher properly.

Someone from 🇷🇺 has copied:

The tarot lady on my TikTok said that you miss me.

Someone from 🇸🇰 has shared:

People who are on Twitter and put intelligent in their bio, good one.

Someone from 🇺🇾 has shared:

USPS tracking: Step 1: We don’t think it exists. Step 2: Delivered.

Someone from 🇯🇵 has copied:

I’m not accepting the bare minimum; I need you to shake it to the max.

Someone from 🇺🇿 has viewed:

I just want someone who can read a book with me in silence, and then do ungodly things sometimes.

Someone from 🇰🇬 has bookmarked:

Showering at night is so sexy and clean and self-care vibes. Showering in the morning is so productivity core, cog in the machine core.

Someone from 🇹🇩 has bookmarked:

My son got braces today. Yay, he’s not going to be a teenage dad.

Someone from 🇨🇬 has downloaded:

Apartments show you 44 pics of the lobby. Man, I ain’t living in there.

Someone from 🇪🇨 has downloaded:

The Gen Z stare. The millennial pause. Instead, let’s talk about the boomer inappropriate personal question.

Social Media Log 💫

Going bananas on Threads:

I can’t sleep good when I know the food is feeling cold in the fridge.

Seen just now on LinkedIn:

Your future doctor is using ChatGPT to pass med school so you better start eating healthy.

Just landed via Instagram:

The male urge to tell you what business used to be located there back in his day.

Making waves on Twitch:

In university, you can literally tell who had no freedom at home.

Spreading quickly via TikTok:

I’m busy watching the vegan couple next door arguing about the Big Mac wrapper I hid in their trash can.

Seen just now on Pinterest:

That bourbon chicken from the mall only tastes good on that toothpick. You order it, and it’s not the same, I swear.

Just shared via Slack:

I’d like to have a word with the groundhog before he starts working this year.

Freshly posted on Pinterest:

There’s no reason to be bored flying on an airplane. Use the time to tell the person next to you your entire life story.

Freshly posted on Twitch:

We put a man on the moon in 1969, and if you elect me to be your president, I promise that we will not stop until every man is on the moon.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

You ever look at yourself on the self-checkout camera and think, “wow, I better write my will.”

Related Funny Posts 🤝

Only at 27 do you become old, and then when you turn 30, you become younger than ever. That’s just how it goes.

Thank God they have medical marijuana in this state. I need it for my joints.

My dream DUI is driving a Saab through the Great British Bake Off tent.

Pinterest recipe so long that it’s now a limited series on Netflix.

The secret to a clean home? Never let your husband or children in.

I’m actually really good looking if you don’t look at me.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨