Wordgag ツ

Commentary:
"Feeling ignored and unloved? Fear not, for there is always laundry waiting to embrace you with open arms…err, hangers! 🧺✨ Who needs human relationships when you have a trusty pile of clothes to fold, right? 😅 #LaundryIsBae"

always, cleaning, companionship, everyday, everyday life, humor, laundry, life, loneliness, support, think

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

Sorry, can’t make it, just remembered I don’t want to.

5 months ago
avoidance, cancel, excuse, honesty, humor, i, just, plans, procrastination, social, social plans, sorry, want
Twitter hits different, cause it’s like the only social media app you can use effectively while playing music.

2 weeks ago
app, cause, different, media, multitasking, music, only, playing, social, social media, Twitter, while
By day I am just a regular loser, by night I am the same loser only it’s nighttime.

2 months ago
am, day, humor, i, just, loser, night, nighttime, regular, same, self-deprecation
I’m sorry, I didn’t realize that you’re an expert on my life and how I should live it! Please continue while I take notes.

2 months ago
advice, conversation, expert, humor, i, irony, life, live, notes, sarcasm, sorry, take
If you’re looking for a wild woman, I just took all of my vitamins in one gulp.

1 month ago
dating, gulp, health, humor, i, just, looking, playful, spontaneity, vitamins, wild, wild woman, woman
“She’s so self-centered”—who’s supposed to be the center of my life? You?

1 month ago
center, humor, life, personality, relationship, sarcasm, self-centered

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Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

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Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇦🇴 has downloaded:

My life is a constant cycle of waiting for the weekend.

Someone from 🇺🇸 has bookmarked:

All my small talk is done with a car horn.

Someone from 🇻🇳 has viewed:

Your problems are neither sexual nor spiritual, they are gastrointestinal.

Someone from 🇦🇺 has downloaded:

Any room can be an escape room when you have diarrhea.

Someone from 🇲🇦 has downloaded:

But have you tried getting slow neck kisses and soft ear whispers about it?

Someone from 🇪🇸 has copied:

Wow, another wooden ball. Would it kill avocado makers to put a different toy in there?

Someone from 🇬🇳 has bookmarked:

My workout goals are simple: I’d just like to be able to get up off the floor without looking like a turtle trying to flip itself back over.

Social Media Log 💫

Trending via Discord:

If you listen closely, you can hear me not caring.

Seen just now on WeChat:

I love airports because the rules of society don’t apply. Eat a pizza and have a glass of wine at 7 am while in track pants. Nobody cares.

Just landed via Twitch:

Girls Just Want To Have Naan

Making waves on TikTok:

I’ve already sent Santa a short letter this week to say hello. Not that he thinks I only get in touch if I want something.

Broadcasted on WeChat:

I used to work at McDonald’s and we only told ugly people that the ice cream machine was broken. So I have bad news if you were ever denied ice cream.

Freshly posted on WhatsApp:

If you don’t realize that you’re a werewolf, then you’re actually an unawarewolf.

Going viral on Reddit:

I don’t need the web for attention, I jog in a wedding dress.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

You may think no one is there for you, but there’s laundry. Laundry is always there for you.

By day I am just a regular loser, by night I am the same loser only it’s nighttime.

I’m sorry, I didn’t realize that you’re an expert on my life and how I should live it! Please continue while I take notes.

If you’re looking for a wild woman, I just took all of my vitamins in one gulp.

“She’s so self-centered”—who’s supposed to be the center of my life? You?

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

This alien invasion could have been an email.

I don’t care about life on other planets. I don’t even have a life on this one.

A little sign under the doorbell that says, “think twice, adventurer.”

I deliberately don’t go to bed early. I don’t want to look like I could be useful for anything the next day.

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

So much anger in this small little body. I feel like a chihuahua.

You don’t get to comment on the world until you’ve made your bed.

I am not living la vida loca. I am loca because of la vida.

The fine art of sticking my nose where it doesn’t belong.

Trending Topics 📁

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Everyone on the bus thinks that they are the main character, when in reality the main character is the bus.

My kids had to work extra hard this morning but they were able to get the clean house back to it’s normal messy state just in time for the guests to arrive.

When I hear the word “horror”, the first thing I think of is bills, not Halloween.

Raisins also have wrinkles and are still sweet.

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

I’m bringing back “holy moly” and nobody can stop me.

A college education is one of the few things a person is willing to pay for and not get.

I think my dog always follows me to the bathroom because I always follow him outside and he thinks that’s the way it works.

You know you’re the father of teen boys when a shoe print on the ceiling no longer fazes you.

I’ve realized that some people don’t like me, but I’ve also realized that I don’t give a shit.

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You may think no one is there for you, but there’s laundry. Laundry is always there for you.

Related Funny Posts 🤝

Sorry, can’t make it, just remembered I don’t want to.

Twitter hits different, cause it’s like the only social media app you can use effectively while playing music.

By day I am just a regular loser, by night I am the same loser only it’s nighttime.

I’m sorry, I didn’t realize that you’re an expert on my life and how I should live it! Please continue while I take notes.

If you’re looking for a wild woman, I just took all of my vitamins in one gulp.

“She’s so self-centered”—who’s supposed to be the center of my life? You?

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

Trending Topics 📁

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

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