Trending Funny Quotes 👇

  • Not to brag but I don’t even need meditation, my mind goes blank the second someone asks me for directions.
  • My computer: Consider changing your password. Me: Consider fighting me in the streets.
  • The most difficult thing you’ll do as a parent is not rearrange the ornaments after the kids put them on the tree.
  • I wonder how many new moms try to pick out a unique name for their baby only to later learn it’s the name of an antidepressant.
  • Some people find it strange when you talk to your pet. I find conversations with some people much stranger.
  • Don’t buy me flowers. A bouquet of KitKats will suffice.