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Commentary:
Well, age and wisdom don't always come as a package deal, do they? 🤣 Embrace the journey of becoming older and (hopefully) wiser, even if it means stumbling along the way like a clumsy but enthusiastic puppy 🐶👴🤓.

age, growth, humor, life, never, old, older, stupid, too, wisdom

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

Never understood why people train their dogs to sit pretty or roll over when there are useful tricks like empty the dishwasher or fold the laundry.

2 months ago

chores, dishwasher, dog, dogs, domestic, domestic chores, empty, fold, humor, laundry, never, over, people, pets, practical, practical skills, pretty, roll, sit, skills, train, training, tricks, useful
Does your life really flash before your eyes or is it just your brain closing all open tabs one last time.

2 months ago

brain, closing, eye, flash, humor, just, last, last time, life, tab, time
When someone sits in the empty seat beside you: flattered yet annoyed. When no one sits in the empty seat beside you: offended yet relieved.

2 months ago

annoyed, awkwardness, empty, empty seat, feelings, humor, irony, mixed, mixed feelings, offended, personal, personal space, reaction, seat, situation, social, social awkwardness, social situation, someone, space
Of course I talk to myself. Sometimes I need expert advice.

3 months ago

advice, conversation, expert, humor, i, myself, need, self-talk, talk
My therapist said I should face my fears. So I turned my phone back on.

2 months ago

anxiety, back, face, fear, fears, humor, i, phone, procrastination, said, should, therapist, therapy, turned
I love that the entire economy is just different types of scams now.

1 month ago

different, economy, finance, humor, i, joke, just, love, sarcasm, scam, scams, types

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

12 shares on Telegram this month:

People aren’t too bad if you stay away from them and don’t go outside.

83 shares on WeChat this month:

The only narcissist I allow in my life is my cat.

74 shares on Twitch this month:

My age is news to me every single time I remember.

96 shares on X this month:

I’m best man at my buddy’s second wedding. Is it appropriate to open my dinner speech with “Welcome back everyone”?

22 shares on WhatsApp this month:

That awkward moment between birth and death.

66 shares on X this month:

Can I come over and crawl around on you like a bug?

26 shares on WeChat this month:

Everyone’s all up in arms about how undemocratic the electoral college is and yet we let our weather be decided by a single unelected groundhog.

46 shares on Facebook this month:

Sometimes I apologize to my car when I hit a pothole.

76 shares on YouTube this month:

A bridesmaid, but to carry the end of my CVS receipt.

65 shares on Instagram this month:

Don’t check on your introverted friends this time of year. They’re probably turning their lights off and pretending they’re not home.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇬🇶 has downloaded:

I respectfully ignore DMs because I promise you, I am not your soulmate.

Someone from 🇬🇷 has shared:

When you’re young, weekends are for fun. When you’re older, they’re for recovery.

Someone from 🇸🇱 has viewed:

Our parents just don’t know how far we rode the bikes when we were young.

Someone from 🇬🇼 has viewed:

House sitting for friends while they’re out of town. Never knew my buddy kept a diary.

Someone from 🇧🇷 has bookmarked:

This year has been the perfect blend of me losing my mind and having the time of my life.

Someone from 🇦🇪 has shared:

Welcome to Twitter, where people never let their lack of knowledge get in the way of expressing a strong opinion.

Someone from 🇵🇭 has viewed:

My sleeping pattern isn’t even a pattern anymore. It’s a lifestyle.

Someone from 🇳🇴 has copied:

I don’t do “casual.” I’m like an 18th-century vampire. When I fall in love, my devotion is boundless and eternal.

Someone from 🇫🇮 has shared:

You give a man your heart and he’s gonna put it under another girl’s picture.

Someone from 🇨🇻 has bookmarked:

I wanna date someone cuter than me, but sadly I am the cutest.

Social Media Log 💫

Just landed via Instagram:

Maybe there’s an alternate universe where onions cry when they chop up humans, you don’t know.

Freshly posted on Threads:

The phrase “don’t take this the wrong way” has a 0% success rate.

Shared recently on Instagram:

Since I’ve stayed away from most people, I get on much better with people.

Shared recently on LinkedIn:

The sexiest woman you know is trying to maintain her balance between insanity and genius.

Just landed via WeChat:

How do you politely tell someone that they ruined your life?

Making waves on Slack:

No one watches your story faster than someone who doesn’t talk to you.

Seen just now on WeChat:

It’s not ‘drinking alone’ if you’re at work.

Freshly posted on Discord:

Chuck Norris can kill two stones with one bird.

Just landed via Reddit:

If you occasionally blow on your bourbon during a Zoom meeting, the other folks will think you’re enjoying a hot cup of tea.

Freshly posted on Reddit:

Not to brag, but I was unhinged way before it was cool.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

You’re never too old or too stupid to become older and stupider.

Related Funny Posts 🤝

Never understood why people train their dogs to sit pretty or roll over when there are useful tricks like empty the dishwasher or fold the laundry.

Does your life really flash before your eyes or is it just your brain closing all open tabs one last time.

When someone sits in the empty seat beside you: flattered yet annoyed. When no one sits in the empty seat beside you: offended yet relieved.

Of course I talk to myself. Sometimes I need expert advice.

My therapist said I should face my fears. So I turned my phone back on.

I love that the entire economy is just different types of scams now.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

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