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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇬🇶 has viewed:

Getting an entry-level job before the release of ChatGPT in 2022 was like taking the last chopper out of Vietnam. Few realize this yet.

Someone from 🇸🇿 has shared:

A real smart TV would increase the volume when you start eating chips.

Someone from 🇰🇲 has shared:

We’re all just a bunch of addicts, struggling with our drug of choice.

Someone from 🇩🇿 has viewed:

All I’m saying is that at first I am shy and then I become a podcast.

Someone from 🇸🇰 has bookmarked:

Oh, so ChatGPT is gonna tell me about me? Seems gossipy.

Someone from 🇮🇷 has copied:

Life is full of questions. Idiots are full of answers.

Someone from 🇸🇷 has bookmarked:

Guess I’ll be getting the same thing for Christmas, again. Fat!

Someone from 🇲🇩 has downloaded:

I’m as single as a one Dollar bill, and I don’t need any change.

Someone from 🇵🇾 has shared:

Please hesitate to get in touch with me.

Someone from 🇸🇬 has bookmarked:

I don’t follow washing instructions, you’re my clothes you don’t tell me what to do.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

215 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,484

Funny Quotes Topics

17,554

Funny Quotes Images

15,484

Updated

Jan 5, 2026

Users Online

3,491

Social Media Log 💫

Spotted on TikTok:

It’s crazy I need a certificate to prove I was born when you can literally just look at me.

Seen just now on Instagram:

I’m at the age where living in the woods and arguing with a raccoon sounds like a peaceful retirement plan.

Freshly posted on WeChat:

Nobody knows what to do with me and I just think that’s beautiful.

Broadcasted on Telegram:

They’re making me do work at work.

Just landed via Pinterest:

Today, I noticed that the cover of my ironing board was wrinkled, and I laughed at the irony. Then I laughed again because of the word “irony.”

Just landed via Twitch:

I wonder if it’s possible to swim from one end to the other in a pool filled with mashed potatoes.

Freshly posted on Facebook:

His palm trees are Serengeti, destination wedding, luggage is heavy. There’s vomit on his tux already, Dollar store confetti.

Just landed via WeChat:

Tried online dating, and it turns out my soulmate is a Nigerian prince who needs my bank details to escape his kingdom.

Shared recently on Snapchat:

If you breakdance you buy dance.

Freshly posted on Facebook:

I’m gonna start cursing people out but with biblical phrases like I hope your crops wither and bear no fruit and the ravens eat your mustard seeds.

“AI is coming for your jobs”. I’d like to see AI show up drunk on Fridays and sexually harass my coworkers.

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“AI is coming for your jobs”. I’d like to see AI show up drunk on Fridays and sexually harass my coworkers.
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Commentary:
Well, if AI starts showing up drunk on Fridays and hitting on your coworkers, at least we can finally say that machines are starting to embrace the 'work hard, play hard' motto 🍻🤖🔥 Just imagine the awkward HR meetings with a robot giving excuses like, "I swear, I thought they were into my efficient algorithms!" 😂 #AIinHR

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Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

88 shares on WhatsApp this month:

If stores want to accurately display clothes for people over 40, the mannequins should be laying on a couch.

54 shares on Facebook this month:

Sometimes happiness is just having a good night’s sleep.

43 shares on WeChat this month:

Diarrhea. Having it. Spelling it. Everything about it is shit.

91 shares on YouTube this month:

My Mom asks why everything is on the floor, like she never heard of gravity.

72 shares on Twitch this month:

Ever since I was a little kid I always knew I wanted to struggle to survive.

88 shares on WeChat this month:

That was the last cup of coffee in my life. From tomorrow I’ll be drinking straight from the pot.

89 shares on X this month:

Suicide is never the answer, you gotta outlive your enemies.

51 shares on LinkedIn this month:

The universe clearly isn’t working as it should so someone should turn it off and back on again.

44 shares on Reddit this month:

Don’t get horny around me; I’m an empath.

91 shares on Slack this month:

Doesn’t matter if the chicken or the egg came first. Still a weird thing to just appear.

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes 💥

19 folks are currently checking 👀

Smithereens is the worst way to get blown.

9 folks are currently checking 👀

Taylor Swift should write a song about when your sleeves keep rolling down every time you wash the dishes.

11 folks are currently checking 👀

Never skip the footnotes – it’s here you find out who made the author angry enough to write the article.

20 folks are currently checking 👀

The best part of vacation with your extended family is talking shit about them on the trip home.

18 folks are currently checking 👀

Earth is hard.

19 folks are currently checking 👀

When someone yells stop, I don’t know if it’s in the name of love, it’s hammer time, or if I should collaborate and listen.

24 folks are currently checking 👀

I had a hard time coping with the divorce. I’m fine now, but at first I was almost crazy with joy.

8 folks are currently checking 👀

I’ve realized that some people don’t like me, but I’ve also realized that I don’t give a shit.

5 folks are currently checking 👀

You don’t need to explain yourself if you carry a chainsaw.

14 folks are currently checking 👀

If hot showers aren’t good for you then why do I emerge from them bright red like a beautiful ruby?

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

215 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,484

Funny Quotes Topics

17,554

Funny Quotes Images

15,484

Updated

Jan 5, 2026

Users Online

3,401

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇩🇿 has bookmarked:

The more you embrace your crazy side, the more fun life becomes.

Someone from 🇵🇬 has viewed:

Money doesn’t impress me. Giving it to me does.

Someone from 🇲🇽 has copied:

Why do they make the wine glass so large if you’re not supposed to fill it to the top?

Someone from 🇸🇪 has copied:

Imagine you get to the gates of heaven and they make you download an app to go in.

Someone from 🇹🇩 has shared:

Jesus invited prostitutes to dinner and was praised for compassion. I do it, and suddenly I ‘made Christmas awkward.’

Someone from 🇲🇽 has copied:

Kids today have it much easier. When I was growing up and something bad happened, we had to go outside and spread our misinformation in person.

Someone from 🇧🇯 has bookmarked:

Handsome, you better get to the point, my beer buzz is starting to wear off.

Someone from 🇬🇹 has bookmarked:

Welcome to your 50s… A new pain will be be assigned to you shortly.

Someone from 🇲🇾 has viewed:

And then I thought to myself, “What’s the point of cleaning if my family is going to keep living here?”

Someone from 🇺🇿 has shared:

I was an ugly baby. It’s been downhill since then.

Social Media Log 💫

Just landed via Threads:

We need a true crime show called Downtown Stabby.

Making waves on Telegram:

We’re in the middle of a snowstorm with no cake in the house. I never expected to perish like this.

Going viral on Discord:

You tell people you’re not trying to drink and they act like you just turned down 100k.

Just shared via WhatsApp:

The day they handed out patience, I left because it was taking too long.

Just landed via Slack:

Imagining how cathartic it must feel to send forth thousands and thousands of bats from your Transylvanian manor.

Making waves on Facebook:

There will never be a perfect time. Make that mistake now.

Seen just now on Twitch:

Adults should not be twins. Being twins is for children.

Freshly posted on WhatsApp:

You have one week to ask me to be your Valentine. Requests must be in the form of poetic verse written in your blood.

Making waves on Discord:

Apparently, if you leave your Tupperware cupboard unorganized for too long, they procreate, and extra lids appear out of nowhere.

Trending via Pinterest:

Unfortunately, I have the paper towel habit of a much wealthier man.

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