Trending Funny Quotes 👇

  • Why procrastinate now when you can always procrastinate later?
  • My workout goals are simple: I’d just like to be able to get up off the floor without looking like a turtle trying to flip itself back over.
  • I got a raise! On my meds dosage. But still.
  • My favorite sex position is any of them. I’m just glad to be involved.
  • Seize the day! Unless it sucks. Then seize the next one.
  • I’ll bet the guy who invented the snooze button never invented anything else.