Trending Funny Quotes šŸ‘‡

  • I’ve started taking a brisk walk straight after dinner and it’s saving me an absolute fortune on restaurant bills.
  • I never get as envious of parents as I do when their baby starts crying and they get to leave the event.
  • We are gathered here today because our ancestors didn’t have condoms.
  • Women in movies look so beautiful when they sleep. Meanwhile, I’m tossing and turning all night like a forgotten 7-Eleven hot dog.
  • “New recipe” is code for “less content, but worse ingredients”.
  • Needing to stretch is so funny. Your body is like ā€œUghhh, make me longer!ā€