Wordgag ツ

Commentary:
"Beer is the versatile ninja of beverages 🍺⚫️ You can never go wrong with a trusty brew by your side, just like the timeless elegance of black clothing! Cheers to the ultimate pairing for any occasion! 🍻🖤"

beer, black, color, compatibility, drink, everything, fun, humor

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

At my age, I’m worried about tripping and falling, so I wear a helmet. I’m also worried about looking ridiculous, so I carry a skateboard.

0

2 months ago

activity, age, carry, falling, helmet, humor, i, looking, ridiculous, safety, skateboard, tripping, wear, worry
Nothing prepares you for the day you wake up and realize you have a favorite cardigan.

0

2 months ago

cardigan, comfort, day, favorite, humor, morning, nothing, realization, realize, surprise, wake, wardrobe
Cats hear everything. They just don’t care.

0

2 months ago

attitude, care, cat, cats, everything, hear, hearing, humor, indifference, just, pet
Using Indeed feels like being an ugly guy on a dating app.

0

2 months ago

app, being, dating, dating app, feeling, feeling insecure, feels, guy, humor, hunt, insecure, job, job hunt, job search, online, online dating, search, self-esteem, ugly, using
You’re the ‘S’ to my ‘HTTP’; without you, I’m just a bad connection!

0

2 months ago

bad, computer, connection, digital, humor, internet, just, love, pun, relationship, tech
The haters said I couldn’t do it. And the haters? They were right. They were correct. They even nailed the small details, frankly it’s amazing.

0

2 months ago

amazing, correct, details, do it, even, haters, humor, i, irony, right, self-deprecation, small

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

🎉🥂 New Year Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

92 shares on Snapchat this month:

I’m so disappointed when I help my kid with her homework, and she brings it home marked incorrect.

11 shares on Messenger this month:

My brain is on airplane mode today.

42 shares on TikTok this month:

If you’re worried that you added too much cheese to the recipe, I am here to reassure you that you did not.

24 shares on Pinterest this month:

I love people who refuse to follow the crowd. The crowd is always lost, follow your inner compass.

24 shares on LinkedIn this month:

If I’d married a wealthier man, I’d be lying on a fancier couch right now refusing to clean bigger rooms.

51 shares on Facebook this month:

Don’t ever get excited if your kid likes a new food. They won’t like it tomorrow.

21 shares on Snapchat this month:

If a door closes, I’m just going to open it again.

20 shares on Messenger this month:

If you can’t handle me at my worst, you don’t deserve me at my horniest.

100 shares on TikTok this month:

Every time someone tries to fight with me online, a middle finger gets its wings.

27 shares on WeChat this month:

Once you are able to find humor in any situation, you’ve either reached enlightenment or you’re just a little unhinged.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇰🇿 has viewed:

I made the mistake of clicking on an Instagram ad for a flannel shirt, and now the algorithm thinks I’m a lumberjack.

Someone from 🇵🇪 has bookmarked:

Maybe dogs are smarter than us because they found a way to get fed and housed without having to go to college and get a job.

Someone from 🇵🇰 has viewed:

Two reasons you never date at work: 1. HR frowns upon it. 2. Your partner gets super pissed.

Someone from 🇫🇷 has shared:

Hey girl, are you an extraterrestrial? ’Cause your husband’s out here acting like you don’t exist.

Someone from 🇵🇦 has viewed:

Adulting is getting excited to go home and get into bed.

Someone from 🇫🇯 has viewed:

I don’t wish anyone strife in their relationship but I do wish my neighbors would enunciate a little more when they fight so I can hear better.

Someone from 🇨🇲 has bookmarked:

An air mattress is the best way to tell your houseguests not to stay too long.

Someone from 🇵🇼 has copied:

When people tell me “you’re going to regret that in the morning”, I sleep until noon because I am a problem solver.

Someone from 🇲🇪 has copied:

Some parents are blessed with amazing kids and others have kids that decide to learn the trumpet.

Someone from 🇦🇸 has copied:

It’s so hot to me when a man has a poorly run Instagram account.

Social Media Log 💫

Making waves on TikTok:

I want a man who doesn’t annoy me while I’m constantly getting on his nerves. It can’t be that difficult.

Shared recently on Threads:

You aren’t from the Midwest unless you can spin out in the snow, regain control and keep driving like nothing happened.

Spotted on Threads:

As a kid, I used to watch The Wizard of Oz and wonder how someone could talk if they didn’t have a brain. Then I got social media.

Just landed via YouTube:

Does your blood pump that way just for me?

Just landed via Threads:

Every morning I wake up and think I have a hangover, but then I realize I didn’t drink, and this is just how I feel now.

Breaking via TikTok:

Maybe I died of Covid in 2020, and this is hell.

Making waves on Messenger:

About four minutes into my run, I’ve decided I want to work on my personality instead.

Making waves on Slack:

My parents told me I could be anything I wanted so I became unacceptable.

Shared recently on Pinterest:

Sneaking up behind people and marrying them.

Seen just now on Twitch:

My parents often told me I would lose my own head if it wasn’t screwed on and now that I’m an adult, I want to know what tools I need to have it screwed off.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

Beer is like the color black: it goes with everything.

Related Funny Quotes 🤝

At my age, I’m worried about tripping and falling, so I wear a helmet. I’m also worried about looking ridiculous, so I carry a skateboard.

Nothing prepares you for the day you wake up and realize you have a favorite cardigan.

Cats hear everything. They just don’t care.

Using Indeed feels like being an ugly guy on a dating app.

You’re the ‘S’ to my ‘HTTP’; without you, I’m just a bad connection!

The haters said I couldn’t do it. And the haters? They were right. They were correct. They even nailed the small details, frankly it’s amazing.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨