“Cut my life into pieces” screamed the earthworm and threw itself in front of my spade.

Someone from 🇦🇴 has bookmarked:

Technology has really helped me waste my time efficiently.

Someone from 🇱🇾 has viewed:

Welcome to your late 40s! From now on you will no longer be in “good health” but in “good health for your age”.

Someone from 🇦🇫 has copied:

Drive like no one is watching.

Someone from 🇲🇱 has downloaded:

Everyone’s an empath until I need to borrow some cash.

Someone from 🇦🇷 has bookmarked:

Shorts should be half the price of pants.

Someone from 🇼🇸 has downloaded:

I would love to be normal, but unfortunately, I was raised by the internet and a microwave.

Someone from 🇹🇼 has copied:

I know that we aren’t supposed to self diagnose but I’ve googled all of my symptoms and I’m fairly sure I’m a raccoon.

Someone from 🇲🇿 has shared:

Buying a new phone isn’t even satisfying anymore. It’s literally just your old phone with a haircut.

Someone from 🇧🇴 has bookmarked:

I wonder how my close personal beloved friend Taylor Swift is doing today.

Someone from 🇰🇬 has shared:

Watched a movie on Netflix last night that was so bad, I walked out of my own house.