Wordgag ツ

Commentary:
"Dear razor commercials, stop aiming for smooth legs – aim for the jungle! 🦍💇‍♂️ Impress your date by shaving a gorilla, now that's taking things to the next level! 🌿😂 #GorillaGroomingGoals"

beauty, beauty standard, commercial, commercials, gorilla, hairless, hairless leg, humor, impress, leg, legs, razor, satire, shave, shaving, someone, standard, stop, want

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

Not trying to brag but this cop says my rear end is smoking.

0

2 months ago

brag, cop, end, humor, joke, rear, rear end, smoking, trying
Before you try to save someone, make sure you’re not interrupting their karma.

0

2 months ago

advice, before, humor, interrupting, karma, life, perspective, save, self-awareness, someone, sure, try
I’m confused how a cemetery can raise its funeral prices and blame it on the cost of living.

0

5 months ago

blame, cemetery, confused, confusion, cost, cost of living, death, expense, funeral, humor, inflation, joke, living, price, prices, raise
One time, I was so high my bra unclasped, and I thought I got shot.

0

2 months ago

bra, embarrassment, got, high, humor, humor story, i, intoxication, misunderstanding, shot, situation, social, social situation, story, thought, time
Nobody rots in bed like I do.

0

2 months ago

bed, humor, i, lazy, nobody, procrastination, rot, sleep
To my beloved wife, I leave my circus and my monkeys.

0

2 months ago

beloved, circus, i, leave, wife

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

57 shares on Telegram this month:

Mama didn’t raise no fool, I turned into one all on my own.

15 shares on Snapchat this month:

Website: We use cookies to improve performance. Me: Same.

87 shares on YouTube this month:

Behind every beautiful woman is either tummy issues, low iron, or poor eyesight.

81 shares on WeChat this month:

I still can’t believe Aldi sells shopping carts for 25 cents. I’ve got 8 of them now and don’t really even have a use for them, it was just too good of a deal to pass up.

97 shares on Facebook this month:

My real introduction to classical music came from watching Tom & Jerry cartoons as a kid. Also how I got into sadism.

31 shares on Instagram this month:

In the 80s, you could literally shrink your kids with a shrink-ray, and your wife wouldn’t divorce you. I’m pretty sure I saw a documentary film about it.

91 shares on Facebook this month:

Sometimes my greatest accomplishment is keeping my mouth shut.

93 shares on Discord this month:

Love when people summon Grok and there’s no reply. He just doesn’t care sometimes.

12 shares on Pinterest this month:

Ironic that the two ơ’s in “cooperate” insist on having their own separate sounds.

20 shares on X this month:

Anyone who wants to learn how to be humble, feel free to talk to me. There’s nothing like learning from the best.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇭🇷 has viewed:

I wish I could have a kid just to see what it looks like… and then put it back.

Someone from 🇺🇸 has bookmarked:

If someone leaves your life, it’s often because the actor playing them is getting cancelled in the real world.

Someone from 🇦🇬 has bookmarked:

To get my cat to eat, I tell him about all the hungry cats in Catfrica.

Someone from 🇨🇺 has viewed:

How long do you actually have to wear a muscle shirt until you get muscles?

Someone from 🇼🇸 has bookmarked:

Edging my house plants by putting them next to the window when it rains.

Someone from 🇨🇭 has copied:

The first 7 days of the week aren’t for me.

Someone from 🇹🇷 has downloaded:

I hope this out-of-office message finds you well.

Someone from 🇦🇺 has shared:

“Thank you for choosing Amtrak.” No problem. There are no other trains.

Someone from 🇱🇧 has copied:

Damn, how much daylight are they trying to save? It’s dark as hell.

Someone from 🇲🇲 has downloaded:

I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again: you either have a naked window neighbor or you are the naked window neighbor.

Social Media Log 💫

Spotted on TikTok:

Is it ‘My wife and I’ or ‘Me and my wife’? Anyway, we just robbed a liquor store.

Broadcasted on Snapchat:

I can’t believe Halloween was 10 pounds ago.

Going bananas on WhatsApp:

They should invent a Sunday that’s longer than a couple of minutes.

Going viral on YouTube:

I’m not like other teenagers, I’m 51.

Trending via TikTok:

Please, Tinder, add AI to your app. I don’t want to be involved in the modern dating experience. Let a robot do it for me. Let the machines suffer in our place.

Seen just now on Discord:

Old age comes at a bad time. Once you finally know everything, you start to forget everything you know.

Trending via Facebook:

Vote for me and I’ll remove all the calories from cheese.

Making waves on YouTube:

My worst fear is looking out my window at night, and someone looking right at me.

Trending via Threads:

If I complain about being out of shape, I don’t actually want fitness tips and workouts to try. I just want to complain and remain out of shape. What is wrong with you people?

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

Dear razor commercials, please stop shaving hairless legs. If you want to impress someone, shave a gorilla.

Related Funny Quotes 🤝

Not trying to brag but this cop says my rear end is smoking.

Before you try to save someone, make sure you’re not interrupting their karma.

I’m confused how a cemetery can raise its funeral prices and blame it on the cost of living.

One time, I was so high my bra unclasped, and I thought I got shot.

Nobody rots in bed like I do.

To my beloved wife, I leave my circus and my monkeys.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨