Trendy Funny Quotes

  • I’m not humiliating myself here for 3 likes. 10 maybe but not 3.
  • I don’t always leave the house, but when I do, I shouldn’t.
  • I need to hire someone to just constantly slap food out of my hand.
  • Whenever I see an athlete eating quark, I get sad, because the quark could have been turned into cheesecake.
  • All the things I like to do are either immoral, illegal, or fattening.
  • The way time stretches between the moment you put your hands under the air dryer and the realization it is in fact a paper towel dispenser.