Wordgag ツ

Commentary:
"Looks like that snooze button is the real MVP 🛌💤 Don't worry, tomorrow is another chance to blame your alarm clock for everything 😆⏰ #MorningStruggles"

bad, bad day, day, every, humor, i, irony, life, life struggle, morning, negativity, single, struggle, woke, woke up

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

Parallel parking: where true relationships are tested!

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3 months ago

challenge, couple, driving, humor, parallel, parallel parking, parking, relationship, relationships, stress, test, tested, true, where
I remember when I was broke… I’m still broke, that’s why I remember so well.

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2 months ago

broke, financial, financial struggle, humor, i, joke, memory, money, remember, self-deprecating, self-deprecating humor, still, struggle, well, why
When I tell you “I’m open to feedback” I’m telling you to be nice to me or I’ll resort to violence.

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2 months ago

communication, expectations, feedback, honesty, humor, i, me, nice, open, sarcasm, self-defense, tell, violence
Thought getting captured by cannibals would be terrifying, but they’re actually feeding me really well.

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3 months ago

actually, cannibal, capture, feeding, food, getting, humor, irony, joke, me, survival, terrifying, thought, unexpected, well
Nothing angers me more than tall ghosts in horror movies. No one born in 1782 was that tall. Do your research, screenwriters.

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2 months ago

accuracy, anger, born, comedy, ghost, ghosts, height, historical, historical accuracy, horror, me, movie, nothing, research, screenwriter, tall
Why are there people outside at the same time as me? It’s my turn.

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2 months ago

frustration, humor, impatience, irony, me, outside, people, personal, personal space, same, solitude, space, time, timing, turn, why

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

🎉🥂 New Year Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

30 shares on Snapchat this month:

Born to screenshot everything and never look at it again.

66 shares on Facebook this month:

I will never forget when my dad had a guy from Verizon call me in middle school to tell me that I was using more data than Obama and that I need to stop.

71 shares on X this month:

The world would be a better place if mosquitoes sucked fat instead of blood.

62 shares on Discord this month:

Nothing refreshes my memory of what I need at the grocery store like coming home from the grocery store.

52 shares on WhatsApp this month:

My brain says “Let’s do something exciting today” but my body says “Don’t listen to that fool.”

60 shares on WhatsApp this month:

Washing your face and water going down your elbow is so sickening.

26 shares on Threads this month:

Windmill? Big fan.

25 shares on Slack this month:

I hate it when what’s wrong asks me what’s wrong.

29 shares on Twitch this month:

That awkward moment when a zombie looking for brains walks right past you.

71 shares on YouTube this month:

They say we learn from our mistakes. That’s why I’m making as many as possible… I’ll be a genius soon.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇹🇩 has viewed:

If the earth was flat, many people would have already jumped off it.

Someone from 🇸🇧 has bookmarked:

The week be like Mooonnnday, Tueeesday, Weeeeednesday, Thuuuuursday, FriSatSun

Someone from 🇪🇨 has downloaded:

When people say I don’t mean to brag, they’re bragging about not bragging.

Someone from 🇷🇸 has shared:

Startup idea: Instagram, but it only shows you posts from people you follow, and they’re in chronological order.

Someone from 🇧🇾 has viewed:

I feel sorry for dogs. They learnt to fetch newspapers, but newspapers are dying. Killed by an internet driven by cats.

Someone from 🇬🇲 has downloaded:

80 years ago we would have all been institutionalized and I think that’s beautiful.

Someone from 🇰🇷 has shared:

Back in my day there was so much toilet paper and so much eggs that we gathered at night and threw them at the houses of our enemies.

Someone from 🇦🇱 has copied:

I’m on that new diet where you eat anything you want and you pray for a miracle.

Someone from 🇸🇷 has viewed:

Sorry for my bad behavior. Mercury is in gatorade or whatever.

Someone from 🇵🇦 has bookmarked:

If you’ve never been hit with gay allegations, you’re not fly enough.

Social Media Log 💫

Seen just now on Reddit:

You ever feel awkward in Target, cause you know you belong at Walmart.

Going viral on TikTok:

Probably the worst thing you can do when your wife gives you a disapproving look from across the room for being on your phone is finish typing this.

Freshly posted on Snapchat:

In terms of wasting time, today was very productive.

Just landed via Messenger:

I made up all these romantic scenarios in my brain and you’re not following the script.

Freshly posted on YouTube:

I always thought that aunts had a lot of money. Until I became one myself.

Freshly posted on Discord:

I have a man cold. Goodbye, world. Tell my story.

Just landed via Telegram:

Inventing the Grinch: “Santa needs a Wario!”

Going viral on X:

Eating cold ravioli counts as breakfast if you’re still wearing yesterday’s clothes.

Freshly posted on TikTok:

My so-called “friends” have asked that I stop referring to them that way.

Broadcasted on YouTube:

I really think my coworkers and I deserve an Oscar for acting like everything at work is fine.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

Every single bad day happened because I woke up.

Related Funny Quotes 🤝

Parallel parking: where true relationships are tested!

I remember when I was broke… I’m still broke, that’s why I remember so well.

When I tell you “I’m open to feedback” I’m telling you to be nice to me or I’ll resort to violence.

Thought getting captured by cannibals would be terrifying, but they’re actually feeding me really well.

Nothing angers me more than tall ghosts in horror movies. No one born in 1782 was that tall. Do your research, screenwriters.

Why are there people outside at the same time as me? It’s my turn.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨