Wordgag ツ

Commentary:
"Life's ultimate reality check: you can talk the talk, but when nature calls, your thug persona better step aside to make way for the panic dance 💃🚽💦 #ThugLife #PeeEmergency"

bathroom, gangster, humor, need, pee, reality, situation, urgency

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

Another day waiting, and wishing, and wanting.

0

2 months ago

another, anticipation, daily, daily life, day, humor, life, longing, patience, waiting, wanting, wishing
I need to move to New York and be miserable. I think it’d be so good for me.

0

4 days ago

change, city, city life, good, humor, i, life, life change, me, miserable, misery, move, need, new, New York, sarcasm, think, york
My favorite part of football is when they feed the players water like they’re hamsters.

0

2 months ago

animal, animal comparison, comparison, favorite, football, hamsters, humor, players, sport, sport humor, water
Sometimes I rock it as a parent, other times I drop my phone on my sleeping child while taking a picture of it. It’s called balance.

0

2 months ago

balance, child, fails, humor, i, multitasking, parent, parenting, parenting fails, phone, photo, picture, sleeping, times
It’s exciting to receive a Valentine’s Day card and not know who it’s from. A Father’s Day card, not so much.

0

2 months ago

card, day, excitement, exciting, father’s, Father’s Day, humor, know, much, mystery, relationships, surprises, valentine’s, Valentine’s Day
D was probably like “lmao ok” when they named the alphabet the ABCs

0

2 months ago

ABC, alphabet, D, humor, lmao, ok

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

62 shares on Pinterest this month:

I’m actually not funny. I’m just really mean and people think I’m joking.

32 shares on Reddit this month:

Why am I scrolling? What am I searching for?

18 shares on Discord this month:

You either have a full ketchup bottle in your house or an almost empty one. There’s no in-between.

31 shares on Instagram this month:

Don’t worry, you’ll find the lost scissors when you’ll be searching for your glasses.

93 shares on Twitch this month:

I really wish people would stop thinking they need to speak to me in the mornings.

63 shares on Snapchat this month:

Currently accepting DMs from any man with a sturdy bunker on his property.

17 shares on YouTube this month:

My playlist so bipolar. We either in love, depressed, or gang members.

86 shares on YouTube this month:

When you are in your 20s, there is going to be an urge to binge The Sopranos. it is very important that you press play.

78 shares on Messenger this month:

It’s okay, wobbly chair, I’m unstable too.

91 shares on WeChat this month:

“I’m getting tired of everything being 100 dollars and 100 degrees.”

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇯🇴 has copied:

If you think swimming with dolphins is expensive, you should try swimming with sharks. It cost me an arm and a leg!

Someone from 🇴🇲 has downloaded:

We put a man on the moon in 1969, and if you elect me to be your president, I promise that we will not stop until every man is on the moon.

Someone from 🇨🇴 has downloaded:

Telling my boss I wasn’t drunk really backfired. I probably should have waited until he asked.

Someone from 🇦🇬 has copied:

The introverted urge to spend a week alone at home after many holidays and family gatherings.

Someone from 🇷🇴 has copied:

I think my new neighbors are creeps. They seem to be looking into my window every time I’m looking out my window to see what they are doing.

Someone from 🇪🇹 has downloaded:

Don’t you hate it when you lose things? Like the motivation to do anything.

Someone from 🇸🇬 has copied:

They say white people don’t have their own culture, but I just got invited to a gender reveal party for a dog, and there’s no way we appropriated that from anyone else.

Someone from 🇮🇩 has shared:

Stop worrying if people like you. They don’t.

Someone from 🇪🇨 has viewed:

I’m as single as a one Dollar bill, and I don’t need any change.

Someone from 🇩🇰 has shared:

We keep a potato masher in a drawer because sometimes it’s fun to not be able to open that drawer.

Social Media Log 💫

Shared recently on Reddit:

People really be like, “I would never do that to you,” and then do it with a remix.

Breaking via Slack:

Every girl is defined by their one lost love. And by that I mean the one fast food item that was discontinued without warning, subsequently ruining their life.

Just landed via Pinterest:

Shoutout to my kids because they aren’t listening!

Just shared via Threads:

Twitter is like group therapy but everyone’s yelling and no one’s licensed.

Making waves on Twitch:

Kids be like: “Nice bathroom mirror. It would be a shame if I spat toothpaste all over it.”

Breaking via Reddit:

“Do not touch” must be one of the scariest things to read in braille.

Shared recently on Slack:

The sexual tension between me and the person I’m not supposed to have any sexual tension with.

Going viral on Snapchat:

I told my computer I needed a break, now it sends me reminders to stretch while I’m lying on the couch.

Spreading quickly via Telegram:

I look stable, but I talk to animals, and wait for them to reply.

Making waves on YouTube:

Me, after skipping the tutorial: how the hell do you play this game?

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

Everyone’s gangster until they need to pee.

Related Funny Posts 🤝

Another day waiting, and wishing, and wanting.

I need to move to New York and be miserable. I think it’d be so good for me.

My favorite part of football is when they feed the players water like they’re hamsters.

Sometimes I rock it as a parent, other times I drop my phone on my sleeping child while taking a picture of it. It’s called balance.

It’s exciting to receive a Valentine’s Day card and not know who it’s from. A Father’s Day card, not so much.

D was probably like “lmao ok” when they named the alphabet the ABCs

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨