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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇲🇪 has bookmarked:

There should be a socially acceptable way to say, “I’m not sure what to say to that. Can you please say something different?”.

Someone from 🇸🇦 has viewed:

One year older today, and still no closer to growing up.

Someone from 🇱🇻 has downloaded:

I am convinced that some of you are failed experiments that gained sentience and escaped from a lab.

Someone from 🇪🇬 has copied:

Either you’re violently frolicking with me or you’re violently frolicking against me.

Someone from 🇧🇼 has viewed:

Relationship so bad you start relating to Taylor Swift songs.

Someone from 🇳🇵 has copied:

“You look nervous” Thanks, I’ve been practicing my whole life.

Someone from 🇳🇮 has shared:

Seriously? I came out of hibernation for this?

Someone from 🇸🇰 has downloaded:

Aging is the worst. I miss the good ol’ days when my pain was strictly emotional.

Someone from 🇱🇸 has downloaded:

I smoke weed for my mental health and your personal safety.

Someone from 🇸🇾 has copied:

Ghosting is actually a sign of great respect in my culture.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

2394 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

12,556

Funny Quotes Topics

15,236

Funny Quotes Images

12,556

Updated

26 minutes ago

Users Online

3,433

Social Media Log 💫

Just landed via Slack:

You ask a girl if she ate, and she gon say, “Yeah, I had my coffee.”

Seen just now on Threads:

I started at the bottom, and it’s been downhill ever since.

Seen just now on LinkedIn:

I am convinced that size matters, especially when it comes to the heart.

Just landed via Slack:

The best thing about work is the coffee machine and the drive home.

Live now on WhatsApp:

They hooked up tubes and sensors, but the doctor still can’t figure out why my kisses are so sweet. They want to hold me overnight and “never let go.”

Making waves on WeChat:

Asking the pharmacy if they have a secret menu.

Reported on Facebook:

My bank assures me my money is safe with them, yet they keep their pens chained to desks and most of them are missing.

Freshly posted on WhatsApp:

My trauma is between me and this bartender. The rest of you, mind your business.

Breaking via Telegram:

Part of getting older is having a favorite pen.

Going viral on Twitch:

If I got a Dollar for every time I thought about you, I would start thinking about you.

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Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

2394 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

12,556

Funny Quotes Topics

15,236

Funny Quotes Images

12,556

Updated

26 minutes ago

Users Online

3,461

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇸🇻 has copied:

Got an email from my bank saying “is your 401k enough to retire on” and it’s like you are my bank, you know it’s not.

Someone from 🇹🇹 has bookmarked:

This cop is parked illegally behind me with his lights on. I’m going to say something.

Someone from 🇹🇻 has viewed:

Everyone gives pleasure in some way, one when they enter a room, the other when they leave it.

Someone from 🇱🇦 has downloaded:

When the past calls, don’t answer it. It has nothing new to tell you.

Someone from 🇸🇬 has viewed:

Due to rising prices, Dollar Tree is changing their name to ‘Tree Fiddy’.

Someone from 🇧🇿 has viewed:

Is it cool if I come into your life and just never leave, like a stray cat?

Someone from 🇮🇹 has viewed:

You’re supposed to store a treasure in your cleavage that’s why it’s called a chest.

Someone from 🇩🇪 has bookmarked:

As you get older you become all of the seven dwarfs.

Someone from 🇫🇮 has bookmarked:

I’m heading to the beach without a beach body.

Someone from 🇧🇼 has bookmarked:

Putting away the Christmas tree. Sad day for cats.

Social Media Log 💫

Freshly posted on Threads:

Don’t forget to brush your teeth, comb your hair, cleanse your face, and share my posts.

Spotted on Instagram:

The two most popular things to do on the internet are arguing about politics and looking at naked people. Million dollar website idea: combine both — naked people arguing about politics.

Broadcasted on Pinterest:

Beautiful women named Severe Thunderstorm Warning are blowing up my phone.

Just landed via Reddit:

I wonder what other animals we tried to ride before discovering that horses were cool with it.

Spreading quickly via YouTube:

Can I come over and figure you out?

Making waves on YouTube:

Just overheard someone describe their hike as “it was like mountain climbing, but flat”.

Trending via Telegram:

Sitting with my legs really wide to experiment with gender.

Just landed via Instagram:

I wish my doctor would put down a little treat to distract me like my vet does for my dog.

Breaking via Reddit:

When you report something to IT and then hear: “Oh! Interesting. We’ve never seen that before.” Is that good or bad?

Breaking via Slack:

I was googling the best time to visit Italy. It is when you have money.

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